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“Any time. It’s my pleasure. I’ve always wanted a sister.”
The timer on Becca’s phone trilled. She got up off the couch. “Moment of truth,” she said.
“This time, I am going with you,” I insisted before Becca could protest. We walked into the bathroom and peered at the two tests sitting on a paper towel on the slate-gray granite countertop. Two pink lines and a definitive pixelated screen spelling “PREGNANT” stared back at us. I was stunned. I was enthralled. We were going to be parents! I could pass Steele Realty on to Sebastian Jr.! The company wouldn’t die with me. I picked Rebecca up and spun her around, dipping her low as our lips clashed together ecstatically. She slipped her tongue into my mouth and tilted her pelvis toward me. I grabbed a handful of her luscious ass. Her body was already filling out more. She was a goddess.
Rebecca weaved her fingers through my hair and groaned as I kissed her neck. Olivia banged on the door, interrupting our reverie, “Are you okay in there?” she called.
Becca pulled away and blushed. “Should we tell her?” she whispered.
“In a minute,” I whispered back. Rebecca and I returned to our upright positions. I pulled her close and kissed the top of her head.
“I love you so much. I love our kid so much,” I whispered.
Becca grinned. “Wow, twice in one day. I love you, too. And our baby,” Becca peered down at her stomach.
“How are you, really?” I asked.
“I’m relieved. For real, I thought I was dying this week. This is a much better alternative. It’s sort of funny. It’s so normal, you know? Tons of couples get married in a rush before the bride pops out a kid. It makes so much more sense than you and my father trying to reinvent the dowry,” Becca noted.
“I hadn’t thought of it like that, but you’re totally right. That’s what my parents did,” I said. In my parent’s wedding photos, you could see the bump that ended up being me, despite the photographer’s best efforts with a variety of creative bouquet placements.
“Really?”
“Yeah. And they’re still together. It’ll be forty years this October.”
“That’s incredible and oddly comforting. I’ll need your mom to back me up once my mother starts plotting my murder,” Rebecca said. At the mention of her mother, Rebecca immediately tensed and placed a protective hand on her stomach. It was like all the joy and excitement had been sucked out of the room.
“Hey, we’ll tell your parents together. If anything, they’ll try and kill me first. I’ll take the brunt of it. That’s the point of a shotgun wedding, right?” I tried my best to reassure her, but my heart started to pound.
Becca scrunched her face up.
“What’s wrong? Are you in pain?” I asked.
“No, I’m doing the math … there’s no way in hell I’ll be able to fit in my dress in September,” she lamented.
“That’s what you're worried about? Your dress?!” I exclaimed.
“Yes! I have a fitting this Friday. Oh, God. Sebastian, there’s a corset! The corset’s made of whale bones, crumbly, delicate whale bones that have a zero percent chance of withstanding the additional pressure put on by my ever-expanding uterus!” Becca gushed, words pouring out of her mouth a mile a minute.
“Is it your uterus that expands?” I asked dumbly.
“Yes! Didn’t you ever go to health class?” Becca shot back.
“No, I always skipped it. It was my last class before lunch,” I admitted. Becca shot me a look. “Is that why you thought condoms didn’t expire?” she asked through gritted teeth.
“Well, I don’t know! They’re made of rubber, and you hear so much about how all the landfills are full of rubber and plastic!” I hissed back. Our mutual panic was feeding off each other.
“Oh, God. My parents are going to kill us. They’re going to bring back the stocks and have us publicly shamed in the town square!” Becca wailed.
“My mom won’t let that happen,” I said as if saying it out loud would make it true.
Olivia knocked on the door again. Becca opened the door. “You’re going to be an aunt, but only if Sebastian and I make it to the wedding alive. My parents might kill us first.”
Olivia did a happy little hop and immediately hugged Becca. “Congratulations!”
She took a step back. “Sebastian, why do you look like you’re going to need to hyperventilate into the CVS bag?” she asked.
“Regina Cavanaugh is going to want my head on a stake! I defiled her only daughter!” I snapped.
