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The professionals did their professional stuff between Christina’s legs. Then they cut the cord, weighed the baby, and did a few other medical things. Then the baby, now more pink than purple, arrived back in Christina’s arms.
Christina held the baby to her breast, and Tibby knew it was done. Christina’s little world remained at two, but the second one wasn’t Tibby anymore. That was as it should be, sad and happy at once.
Slowly Tibby unfolded her limbs and climbed off the bed. She wanted to leave quietly, to let Christina have her unadulterated joy.
But before she did, she planted a kiss on Christina’s head. “You kicked ass,” she whispered. It wasn’t quite the wording of a Hallmark card, but it did express her true feelings.
Near the door, she bumped into Lauren, bustling about. Lauren paused. “Tibby, you have an unorthodox coaching style, but it is very effective. Would you be available for future labors?” Lauren was half laughing, but Tibby could see she’d been crying too. She was wiped out.
“No way.” Tibby stopped. She needed to know something. It felt important, like her future suddenly hung on the answer. “Hey, Lauren?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t you get used to this? I mean, haven’t you done it hundreds of times?”
Lauren pushed her hair behind her ears. Her purple liner was smudged. Her face was shiny with sweat. “Yes.” She looked at her hands. “But no. It’s a miracle. It’s different every single time.”
To love another person is to see the face of God.
—Victor Hugo
The three of them, Carmen, David, and Win, crashed into labor and delivery with such speed and force you would have thought they were each having a baby of their own.
Tibby’s was the first familiar face they saw. She was wearing hospital scrubs with a lot of scary-looking stains, standing in the hall with a bewildered expression. As soon as she saw Carmen she burst into tears. “You have a baby!” she screamed.
“We do?”
“Oh, my God.”
David was darting around, trying to find Christina.
“Over here!” Tibby grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him into a room.
It was a hospital room and, of course, it featured a bed. The bed featured a flushed woman in a pale pink gown, and she in turn featured a tiny, blanket-wadded bundle topped by a knit hat the size of a tennis sock.
Carmen was surrounded by shouts and yells and exclamations of surprise and joy, so many and so voluble that she couldn’t tell which one came from whom—not even if it came from her own throat. She let David beat her to the bed, but she was a fast second. With expansive arms she pressed herself on her mother and this baby and even David. Christina was laughing and sobbing, and Carmen felt her own breaths coming out in those same general types of contortions.
“We have a baby!” David pulled away a few inches to try to get a grasp on the situation. “Right?”
Christina was the madonna now, calm and wise. She laughed at his tortured face. “Yes, this one is ours.”
Tears were coursing down David’s face. He needed to make sure of Christina before he grappled with the idea of this baby of his. “Christina, I am so sorry—I don’t know how—”
Christina pressed her hand to his face. “Don’t say anything else about that. I had Tibby. We have a beautiful, healthy baby.” She looked at Carmen. “You too, nena. Right now I have everything on the earth that I want.”
With trepidation Carmen and David both peered at the tiny thing.
“Do you want to know what it is?” Christina asked.
Carmen was so overwhelmed, she’d forgotten about that whole issue. That had mattered to her once, hadn’t it?
“It’s a boy,” Christina said joyfully.
“Oh!” Carmen let out another scream, but she thoughtfully directed it away from her mother’s ear. “We have a boy!”
David cried some more.
Carmen looked over her shoulder at the door of the room. She wanted to share this deep pleasure with Tibby and Win, but both of them had gone.
Carmen realized she needed to find them. She also needed to give her mother and David and their baby a moment together.
She backed up a little, seeing the three of them framed in a triangle. Her mother’s face radiated such relief and joy that Carmen felt her own face pressing itself into that same shape, without even thinking. Her connection was so overpowering, she felt like her mother’s face was her own, her mother’s heart was beating with hers, her feelings were the same.
And she remembered the thing about being able to feel someone else’s joy and knowing that you loved them.
Good and Great Carmen,
This is a day for miracles. Put on the Pants, and take one for your very own.
All my love,
Tibby
When Carmen found the Traveling Pants neatly folded with the note right outside the door to her mother’s hospital room, she raced into the bathroom and pulled them on.
Then she took the elevator up to geriatrics. Win stood by the vending machines. He was searching his pockets for change. It so happened that neither of them had eaten anything but Corn Nuts in many hours.
Her impulse was to hug him, and she didn’t give herself the time to chicken out. She just threw her arms around him. “Thank you so much, Win!” she exclaimed with a full throat. “Thank you for everything.”
“I’m sorry we didn’t get to her in time,” Win said into her hair. His arms had made their way around her, too.
“I think it’s okay. I think everything is okay now.”
“Hey, I didn’t mean to disappear before. I just didn’t want to get in the way of your family and everything,” he explained.
“I know, but I needed to see you.” She pulled away a little, to give him some room.
He didn’t seem to want to take it. He put his face back into her hair, pressing his cheek against her ear. “I need to see you, too,” he murmured.
He held her closer. She let her body relax into his, feeling his breathing. She felt his backbone under her palms. Her heart was beating only a few inches from his.
“I need to say something to you,” she said over his shoulder.
He lifted his head. He let her back up from him a little. He had a look on his face that said it was girding for disappointment.
“There’s this thing I’ve been worrying about, and I have to set it straight.”
His look of apprehension grew.
She breathed out. “I think you might think I’m a good person, and I wanted to let you know that I’m not. I am mean and selfish most of the time.”
He tipped his head, confused.
“You are too good for me,” she explained.
“That’s impossible.”
“No, seriously, Win. You are a good person, and I’m only pretending to be one. I’ve given you this false impression that I’m selfless and kind. And I’m not.”
Win raised his eyebrows. “God, that’s a relief. You may think I’m good, but I was starting to feel pretty intimidated.”
“Really?”
“Oh, yeah.”
“I got eight fifty an hour to babysit Valia.” She figured she might as well go for full disclosure.
“Man, you deserved a hundred.”
