AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I don’t give a fuck!” Dad insists. I’ve never seen him like this. I've seen him angry a couple of times, but he's never lost control or resorted to anything violent.
Ace doesn't flinch. He stands there, quiet and still in the middle of the storm that is my father.
I study my dad's face, but it's not the red-mottled color I had expected. Instead, it’s pale white. His eyes are wide in his face.
Unbidden, a memory returns. A moment when I was about seven or eight. My father hugged me before bed. “Daddy didn’t mean to yell. He was scared. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
Earlier that day, I had been dancing too close to a candle my mom had left burning. I’d knocked it over and accidentally caught the kitchen curtains on fire. My dad had come in and put it out while yelling at me. His face was white like today. That was when I learned that my dad doesn’t express fear like other people. It usually comes out as anger. But why would he be afraid today? What could he be so terrified of?
I want to help him. I want to ease whatever fear is tormenting him.
Stepping forward, I say weakly, “Hi, Daddy.”
Dad does a double take, looking from Ace to me and back again. All of his fury stills. He shakes his head, jaw slack. “No. No.”
A heartbeat of silence passes. It feels like a lifetime.
“How long?” Dad’s voice is a growl.
“A day or two,” I admit. I’m not sure which one of us he’s talking to.
My dad’s gaze never leaves Ace’s face. “How long?”
“Four years.”
My heart skips a beat. He’s wanted me that long. Ace has wanted me for four years, and he’s never said anything. Never made a move.
Dad doesn’t say anything else. He shakes his head one more time. He’s not looking at me. He won’t look at me. He turns, leaving the cabin without a word.
I stare, unblinking at the front door. My ears are straining, listening to the sound of his motorcycle fading in the distance.
Suddenly, I’m crying. I’ve been selfish, and I’ve ruined everything. I did the one thing I was trying to avoid. I pulled the two men I love most apart. They’re like brothers, and I’m driving a wedge between them.
Ace puts his arms around me, offering comfort even though I don’t deserve it. “I messed everything up.”
“No,” he insists in a firm tone, “This is my fault.”
12
MACKENZIE
He sitson the couch and pulls me into his lap. He wraps a blanket around me when I start to shiver. “There are things you need to know about your father’s reaction today. It had nothing to do with you, and everything to do with me.”
I sniff. “You want me to go. I should go. I’m sorry.”
I try to leave the comfort of his embrace, but he tightens his hold on me. “Let me explain.”
I wait, barely breathing. I didn’t expect my father to be happy when he learned that the two of us were sleeping together. But I also don’t understand what just happened. I need someone to help me make sense of this.
Ace is silent for a long moment, searching for the words. Finally, he starts speaking in a raspy tone, “A few years back, Rogue woke in the night. He had a horrible feeling, so he drove for hours to see me. He arrived at my place right as dawn was starting.” He swallows hard. “I was sixty seconds away from pulling the trigger. I had it all planned out, every last detail.”
My blood runs cold at his admission. I don’t know how to process this. I don’t know how to help him. I desperately wish I could reach back in time to that man.
I cup his face, lifting it so that he’s looking into my eyes. “I’m sorry that things were so dark for you.”
“My last mission had gone sideways. I thought the darkness would always be with me. It felt like it was swallowing me whole, eating me from the inside out. I thought the only way to make the pain stop was to end things. Then Rogue showed up and stayed with me until I could see a psychiatrist. For seven months, he was my constant companion.”
“In my freshman year of high school, Dad went away for several months. Mom said that he was camping with his buddies. They never told me.” It makes sense that they didn’t. They were protecting Ace.
