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“It sounds like you’ve made your decision. I suggest you leave. My lawyers will be in touch to work out a joint custody agreement.”
The words are cold and final in a way I should be grateful for. We’ve both made our decisions, and there’s no going back.
I do the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
I turn and walk away from the one man I don’t think I’ll ever get over.
* * *
An hourlater I emerge from the subway in Brooklyn and walk up to mine and Maria’s old apartment. I’ve only been gone two months, but it feels like a lifetime ago.
I slide the key into the lock and step inside.
Maria’s flopped in front of the TV shoveling Thai food into her mouth. She looks up, startled. “What are you doing here? I thought you had plans with Gage tonight.”
I open my mouth to answer.
Instead, I just start crying.
Maria leaps off the couch and wraps me in a hug. “Oh,honey.I don’t know what happened, but it’s going to be okay. Eventually. Even if right now it doesn’t feel like it. You’re resilient as fuck, and you’re going to be okay.”
I bury my face in her shoulder and try to believe her.
Intellectually, I know she’s right. I’ll be okay one day. So will Gage, and so will our kid.
But I don’t think I’ll ever be the same.
24
GAGE
Idon’t entirely remember how I make it back to my apartment. Everything feels like a miserable blur as I step out of the elevator and head down the hallway to my door.
The only reason I got so close to Violet was because of this damn fake engagement. And now the engagement is exactly why she believes I’m not ready to be her husband.
There’s some fucking irony for you.
I open my door and step inside, knowing without knowing that Violet won’t be there. She’s probably run back to Brooklyn by now. All I want to do is find some whiskey and drink myself into oblivion.
Then I hear the sound of footsteps upstairs, and my heart lifts.
If she came back, maybe she’s willing to talk.
Maybe I can still change her mind.
I race upstairs and follow the sounds to the kitchen.
But when I get there, it’s not Violet.
Instead, Tom and Jaylen stand in my kitchen, arguing about whether it’s better to put the champagne in the fridge or an ice bucket. There’s a pile of decorations on the table. A handful ofCongratulations!!balloons float and bob above the table in cruel mockery.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“Shit,” Jaylen says. “I knew we should have started sooner.”
Tom gestures to the decorations. “I felt bad about how this afternoon went down. And you gave us spare keys for your place that one time. I just wanted to show you that I support you both.” He smiles hesitantly. “If you and Violet make each other happy, that’s good enough for me.”
I know he means well, but his optimism is like a knife to the heart.
