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Alarm sirens went off in my head. “No.” Why would they leave, and where would they go?
She climbed from the bed and stood in front of me. Her skin had a damp sheen, her wet hair tied back behind her, and she smelled of lavender and honey. I clenched my fists until my nails broke skin. How badly I wanted to reach for her and trail kisses across her smooth neck, devouring her nectar.
“Draevyn,” she said, biting her lip and twisting the hem of her robe. “I know you think they were good nurses, but Mrs. Euphemia is examining the contents of the poultice. She agrees with me that something seems off.”
I swallowed at that. “What do you think it could be?”
“I don’t know, but if they return, they will not treat him again, and I will be allowed to question them using my siren voice.” She dragged a hand through her hair, her gaze wandering toward my brother, lying far too still in her bed. “I will not budge on this. Understood?”
I nodded my agreement. How could I not? “Excuse me,” I said as I strode out to the balcony. I flew up to the battlements, giving a guard lieutenant explicit instructions to immediately organize a search party. These nurses would be found and interrogated. Surely, there had to have been a misunderstanding. Why would they want to harm my brother?
I returned to Shirina’s balcony, not surprised to see her standing by the railing. She’d wrapped a blanket around her narrow shoulders, moonlight painting her skin in an ethereal glow as she watched the western skies, her eyes shining with longing. How I wished she longed for me in the same way she pined for my brothers. She didn’t move or bother to spare me a glance as I landed beside her. Her hair was plastered to her face, and she had dark circles under her eyes. Even worse were her concaved cheeks. She’d appeared a little thin when we’d first found her, but now she looked like she was wasting away.
I cleared my throat, summoning the nerve to speak. “I’ve sent a party in search of the nurses.”
“Thank you,” she answered, her gaze still focused on the sky.
“You don’t need to thank me, Shirina.” I dug my fingers into the banister, a deep chasm widening in my chest. I’d trusted those nurses to heal my brother, and instead they might have made him worse. What kind of a lord was I that I couldn’t keep my own brother safe within my castle walls? “I’m sorry I trusted those nurses.” Shame flushed my cheeks as the words came out on a rasp.
“Is that all you had to tell me?” she asked, her voice slightly cracking.
She wanted me to go, leave her alone so she could dream of my brothers in peace. “No.” I pushed off from the banister, unable to tear my gaze from the long column of her neck, the tilt of her chin, her luscious, full lips. “The servants told me you hardly touched your supper.”
She gave me a side-eyed glare. “As if I could eat.”
“You must keep up your strength.” I took a chance and moved closer, the lavender smell on her skin awakening the fire in my veins. “Shirina, forgive me, but you’re wasting away.”
She looked at me as if I’d kicked a puppy. “You expect me to eat when my mate isn’t waking?”
I forced myself to look away from the hatred reflecting in her eyes. “You think it’s not tearing me up that my baby brother might die?”
She threw up her hands, crossing to the other side of the balcony. “What do you expect from me?”
Fool that I was, I followed her retreat. “You don’t have to take all this burden on your shoulders. You can lean on me, too.”
Averting her gaze, she wrapped her arms around herself, looking too small and vulnerable for a powerful white witch. “You’re doing enough by providing us food and shelter.”
I took a chance and grasped her shoulders, desperately searching her face for any sign at all that she would acknowledge our bond. “I want to take care of you, protect you.”
My heart shattered when she jerked away and swiped tears from her eyes.
“Shirina,” I pleaded, my voice breaking, “will you ever be able to forgive me?”
She turned up her chin, the defiance in her eyes making her even more beautiful. “I don’t trust you not to hurt me or the girls again.”
I heaved a weary sigh. “I was consumed by rage. I won’t let that happen again.”
“When do you think Blaze will return?” she asked as she turned away, indicating she was done with that conversation.
I heaved a groan of defeat. I’d ruined my chance. She didn’t want me, and I didn’t think she’d ever want me. “With any luck, he should return tonight, tomorrow at the latest.”
“I hope so.” She walked toward the doors leading to her bedchamber and stopped, her spine stiffening. “I need to get to sleep.”
“Goodnight, Shirina.” I couldn’t hide the longing in my voice if I tried.
She clutched the side of the door, her knuckles whitening. “Goodnight, Draevyn.”
“I won’t mind if you call me Drae,” I called at her back, feeling like a fool when she didn’t answer as she continued into her bedchamber.
