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“Shirina.” Draevyn visibly swallowed, and I nearly melted beneath the intensity of his gaze. “I meant what I said.”
That strange pull that I suspected to be the unfulfilled mating bond thrummed between us like my heart had floated out of my chest and entwined midair with his. I gritted my teeth, forcing that invisible tether to snap. It made no difference whether he was lying or sincere. Whether he’d somehow resurrected that shriveled up heart of his and had decided he could finally love me. He was too late. I refused to allow his heart to entwine with mine after all he’d done.
I abruptly stood, needing to get away from his piercing gaze. “Right now, we need to get you girls in the bathtub,” I said to the children while refusing to look at Draevyn. “You smell like trolls.” I pulled out their chairs and held my hands down to them. “Come, girls.”
They took my hands, blinking at Draevyn as if he was a mongrel who’d wandered into our yard and they were still deciding if he was friendly enough to pet.
Draevyn stood, too, his wings ruffling behind him. “I’ll send servants to prepare their bath and bring fresh clothes.”
“Thank you,” I answered curtly, refusing to look at him as I tugged the girls toward the stairs. My spine stiffened as I felt his gaze boring holes through my skull all the way back up the stairs. I didn’t know what he was about, and I still didn’t trust his motives. Whatever the cause for his sudden kindness, I wouldn’t drop my guard around him. He’d already had his chance to win my heart. He would not get another.
* * *
Nikkos wasn’t wakingand he wasn’t answering any of my mental pleas. I’d spent the better part of the past hour probing his mind for any signs of clarity, anything at all, but his mind was as barren as a dried lake bed. His breathing was so shallow, I could scarcely hear him. His pulse was weak, but I refused to believe he was slipping away. I forced myself to remain strong for the girls, plastering a smile to my face while trying not to lose my soul to the darkness. Had I found my fated mate only to lose him? One night of heaven in his arms would never be enough. How would I go on without my sweet Nikkos?
The girls and I took a bath together in the biggest washtub I’d ever seen, made from smooth ivory stone in an adjoining bath chamber beside a warm, crackling hearth. I washed my face several times to mask the tears, my depressing thoughts threatening to sweep me under while the girls giggled and splashed. I prayed Blaze would return to us soon, for I needed someone to help me shoulder this overwhelming burden of sorrow.
After we dried off, I brushed the girls’ hair by the fire in our bedchamber, my gaze repeatedly drifting toward my motionless mate. I couldn’t lose him. I tied our hair back in pretty, soft ribbons and we put on silky nightgowns. The fabric felt like water between my fingers.
Aurora rubbed the hem of her gown across her cheek. “I love it here,” she said with a sigh.
“Me, too,” Ember said. “I never want to leave.”
Fighting back tears, I kissed their temples then tucked them in beside Nikkos, careful of his wings. I’d already kicked the nurses out of the room after they’d offered to give the children a sleeping potion. What was it with people wanting to drug my nieces? The nurses didn’t seem to be doing any good, other than constantly trying to squeeze puss from Nikkos’s wound rather than giving him a moment’s peace. And the medicine they’d slathered on his wound smelled worse than the infection itself, like fermented eggs that had sat out too long in the sun.
I squeezed between my nieces while looking over Aurora’s head at Nikkos, saddened to see him lying so still. After Aurora fell asleep, I’d scoot her over, so I could sleep next to him, if for no other reason than to hold him one last time in case he passed during the night. I bit my lip, fighting back tears at the thought.
Pulling the blankets to my chin, I blinked up at the shadows from the overhead chandelier moving across the canopy above our bed like twirling dancers in a waltz. For the first time I missed our cramped loft bed, which was probably now cinders and ash. I missed our small yard, our grumpy old dog, the clucking hens, and even the smell of mildew that permeated the air. I missed my sister. Even though they’d deceived me, I missed my parents. I missed the way my mother sang to us before bed. I missed my father’s strong, warm hugs and tender smile.
“Auntie, is Uncle Nikkos going to die?”
I looked over Aurora, her gaze flitting from my sleeping mate to me.
I wiped tears from my eyes, forcing out the answer. “No.” It wasn’t a lie. Itcouldn’tbe a lie. I wouldn’t let him die.
She sat up, frowning down at his prone form. “How do you know?”
I breathed out a shaky breath, my throat so constricted it hurt to speak. “Because I won’t let him.”
She made a face while looking at him. “His head smells.”
“I know,” I said, sighing. “It’s the medicine.”
I shot up at a sharp rap on the door. I heard footsteps in the sitting room, and Draevyn came into my bedchamber without an invitation, his wings tucked tightly behind him, his wet hair tied back in a queue. “How is he?” he asked as he heaved a sack onto the dresser.
I swiped more tears from my eyes, angry with myself for appearing so vulnerable. “Still not waking.”
“Give him time to heal.” Draevyn approached the bed like I was a wounded, feral animal. Then again, maybe I was. “The nursery has comfortable beds,” he continued, motioning toward the children. “I’m sure they’d be happy there, so you and Nikkos can have some privacy.”
The girls snuggled closer to me as I leaned against the headboard and wrapped my arms protectively around them. “Thank you, but no,” I answered tersely. “I want them here with me tonight.”
He flashed a tight smile. “Of course.”
I wondered his true motive for wanting to separate us, and I was once again tempted to use my siren voice to bade him tell the truth. He couldn’t blame me if I did. He’d already given me plenty of reasons to mistrust him. I peered down at the girls’ heavy-lidded eyes. If he would just leave, I could get them to fall asleep. Aurora rolled into me, using my stomach as her pillow. I gently rubbed her back, trying to coax her to sleep.
I tensed when Draevyn sat on the edge of the bed, his musky, woodsy smell teasing my senses. Lifting the bandage from Nikkos’s head, he checked his wound, frowning. “The bleeding has stopped, but the swelling isn’t going down.”
Even though I’d only just met him, I couldn’t imagine living without Nikkos. I have already lost so much. How could fate be so cruel as to take my mate away? “I know.” I clutched my chest, straining for breath as my world darkened. “I hope the green witch arrives soon.”
