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I frowned. “I do. Just moving in together feels…”
“Like a commitment?” he finished the thought.
I grimaced.
He sighed. “I should have broken things off at Christmas. Hell, I should have the first time I asked and you turned me down. But, like I said, I really like you.”
“I like you, too.”
But not enough to move with him or move in with him or rearrange my life for him. That much was clear now, at least.
“This? Us? It’s not going to work.” He wrapped an arm around me, pulling me in for a hug. “I hate that.”
The disappointment in his voice tugged at my heart. He really wanted us to work out. And I…didn’t.
I wrapped my hands around his waist, burrowing my face into his chest. “I’m sorry.”
“Me, too,” he said, voice muffled by my hair. “I really am. Good luck out there.”
And then he let me go.
CHAPTER6
Ben
I cutinto the sheet cake, hacking the word “Congratulations” apart and placing a chunk on my plate.
Most of the money brought into the rescue went toward animals and staff salaries which meant the office buildings were little more than cheap sheds, retrofitted with heat. On the rare occasions when the entire staff came together, we gathered at my house. Whitney’s going away party was no exception.
“You didn’t have to do all this,” Whitney said, sidling up beside me and carefully cutting her name out of the cake. “I hate that I’m leaving you in a lurch.”
I forced a smile. “It’s fine, I swear. Besides, it’s not like Doug can help where he’s stationed. I should be happy he’s only in Portsmouth. If he got shipped to somewhere like Alaska, we’d really be screwed.”
She ate a forkful of cake with a frown. “Any luck finding a new vet?”
I shook my head. “Not yet. I’ve put in some calls. There’s someone in Concord who used to do exotic animal work willing to come up for $400 an hour, plus expenses.”
Whitney whistled under her breath. “Damn, I really undercharged you, didn’t I?”
“You’ve seen our finances. I can’t afford that.”
“Dr. Roberts?”
“Hard no.”
Whitney’s boss had been the only veterinarian within twenty miles when I first started the rescue and I couldn’t convince him to come on board. I certainly couldn’t convince him five years later.
She laughed. “That sounds right. His hip has been acting up and he’s afraid he’s going to take a spill and break it. He stopped seeing anything big enough to knock him down. But don’t worry. I’ve put out some feelers. I’ll let you know if I find someone. Until then, Lexi offered me a room at her place, so I’ll come up every other week for the next two months until the wedding.”
“And then I have you for a full week, minus the ceremony, of course.”
She hit me with her shoulder, smiling. “You wish. I kept a couple of hours free, though, to help you out. That is, of course, unless you’ve found my replacement by then.”
“Replacement? For you? Doesn’t exist,” I said, nostalgia washing over me. “A shadow of a successor. Not the original at all.”
“I’m really going to miss this,” she said with a soft sigh. “I’m going to miss you all so much.”
“We’ll miss you, too.”
