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“Hey, watch your language, please.” It sounds like something a father should say.
“Yeah, I’ll watch my language when you start behaving like the dad who adopted us.”
He hangs up the phone, and I had forgotten I was with Liam.
“Did you call him?”
He shakes his head no. “But can you blame him? He trusted you two. You used to have your shit together. So yeah, he’s pissed, and rightfully so.”
I grab for my jacket, and stop in front of his bed. “And when you find out what the fuck is going on, then maybe you’ll give us some grace, asshole.” I storm out of his hospital room, leaving as I attempt to come up with something, anything, that will help explain this shit to Devin. I’m not sure he’d even believe the truth at this point.
* * *
Ashton is waiting outsidefor me when I pull up to the house we chose to raise our family in together. “What do we say? Should we trust him with the truth? I think he should know. We’re tearing his world apart. He suspects one of us is stepping out on the other. And as fucked up as this is, and as stupid as you’re being right now, don’t you think he deserves the truth?”
“But, we all chose to leave it at the amount of people that have to know, like Tia and Liam,” I insist. “I know he’s technically an adult, but is this something we want to burden him with?”
“So, what do we say? He’ll think its cheating. He already asked who cheated on who.
And he’s mad, so fucking mad, baby.” He reaches for me, holding his hand on my hip.
“I can only imagine. He trusted us with his brother and sister, so he could live his own life, and we promised we’d put them first. But, if we’re on the same page, divorced parents do it all the time.”
He steps back, his touch leaving my body. “We’re not getting a fucking divorce, Noah James. This is a setback, but you need to get out of your own fucking mind. The world won’t know about us. And we’re no different than we were two weeks ago.”
This is the same conversation we have each time we’re together. And it doesn’t solve anything.
“We can discuss our future at a later date. What do we say to Devin? We need to have a united front.”
“I don’t know. You’re the one who wants to rip our family apart. So why don’t you fucking tell me what we should say. We can’t tell him the truth, and you’re ready to throw us away. So, you come up with something, you fucking jackass homewrecker.”
He leaves me on the porch, slamming the door behind him. I guess it’s now or never. I’m expecting just Devin, but when I walk in, Dev, Collin, Lainey and Ash sit on our sectional couch, all eyes on me.
“Hey guys.” I walk in as if this isn’t a big deal. I haven’t had a chance to figure out what to say. I move the large over-sized padded ottoman back so I can see everyone. “I’m sorry this is happening to our family, guys.”
“If we did something wrong, I promise we won’t do it anymore. We’ll put up our shoes, we’ll scrape our plates after dinner. Just don’t leave us, Daddy.” Lainey is crying, and Dev picks her up, placing her on his lap.
“Lainey, it’s not your fault,” he whispers in her ear. He shoots his attention to me. “Go to schoolyou said.Be a kid, you said.You deserve this, you said.We have Collin and Lainey, you said. And I did. I trusted you both. And I get a phone call from Collin that Lainey is so distraught and you moved out.” He moves his attention to Ash, “And you are spending most of your time in your room. I understand that shit happens. If anyone does, it’s me. We don’t expect you to be perfect and if you’re getting a fucking divorce, then do it. But be honest with us, especially these two kids who trust that you will never leave them.” He stands with Lainey in his arms, and reaches for Collin’s hand. “Come on, guys. I’m too mad to talk with our fathers right now.”
They ascend the stairs, and the door to Devin’s room shuts, and we’re left in silence.
“Fuck, Ash. He’s not wrong. We’ve completely fucked up.”
Ashton pushes from his feet. “I can admit I should have been more attentive to them this week. That’s on me, but you left me to pick it all up. You’ve been detached and not around. I have feelings too, asshole.”
He’s out of the back door, taking the path to our studio. This is one hundred percent on me, and I have no idea what I should do next.
46
Ashton
The house has toomany reminders of Noah. He’s been gone for two weeks, and our entire world has blown up. Tia is inconsolable, and Liam can’t accept my mom, no matter how much she tries. Seeing my mother hurt, having a child she gave birth to rejecting her, is brutal.
He won’t talk to me either. We’re in the same boat. This happened to us, and yet, Liam is pulling into himself like Noah is.
I can’t watch my sister cry every time I see her. Coming to grips that your brother, who has always been her best friend, isn’t her brother, or that she’s in love with a man who is her real- life brother, is hard to swallow. We’re in the same boat.
I’m spending time getting to know Evelyn and Carl, never forgetting my own mother, the person who raised me. To my knowledge, Liam only speaks to Noah, not even the parents who raised him. Our family is broken. Will I ever find a day where the pain isn’t so great?
