Page 17 of The Grumpy Dad


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She rolled her eyes. “You can’t tell me what to do when I’m a grown-up.”

“Ha,” I said. “Want to bet on that?”

“I think it looks cool,” she said. “I could get a butterfly or a ballerina.”

“On her, they look great.” I nodded. “But not on you.”

“Da-ad,” she groaned.

“Look at your menu and see what you want to eat,” I told her. I was rethinking my options. I thought the tats were kind of cool and edgy, but maybe it wasn’t a good idea to put her in Lily’s life. I didn’t know the woman. I didn’t want her to end up being a bad influence on my daughter.

“Can I have the fish?” she asked.

“Are you sure?”

“I had chicken already and we had burgers the other day,” she reasoned.

I nodded, feeling a little guilty for her poor dinners this last week. Izzy managed to feed her lasagna one night, but other than that, it was whatever the closest drive-thru offered. I was going to hire a cook for a couple of weeks just to make sure she got some good meals.

“I think I’m going to have a burger,” I told her.

Deanna came back with our drinks. “Do you guys know what you want to order?”

Lily had suddenly gone mute. She looked at me. “I’ll have the mushroom and Swiss burger and Lily would like the fish and chips.”

“Oh, do you like tartar sauce?” Deanna asked Lily.

Lily looked at me. I gave a small, reassuring nod. “I like ketchup,” Lily said. “With mayonnaise.”

“Ah, fry sauce.” Deanna nodded. “That’s my favorite. I dip my tater tots, fish, and fries in that stuff. And I sometimes put it on my hamburger.”

“You do?” Lily asked.

“Yes.” Deanna smiled. “Sometimes I add a little ketchup to my tartar sauce. Have you ever tried that?”

Lily looked at me again. “No. Is it good?”

“It’s really good,” Deanna told her. “I’ll bring you some tartar and you can add ketchup. If you like it, I’ll bring you more.”

“Okay.” Lily grinned. “Do you like ranch?”

Deanna made a big show of putting her hand over her heart. “Do I like ranch? Girl, I eat ranch on everything.”

Lily was relaxing by the second. “Dad says I eat too much ranch.”

“Only when you eat more ranch than you do the food you’re supposed to be putting it on,” I said.

“Do you want any ranch?” Deanna asked.

“No, thank you,” I answered.

“Alright, I’ll get this to the cook,” she said. “As you can see, we’re busy this afternoon. Our cook is back there busting his butt, so it might take a little longer than normal.”

“We’re fine waiting,” I assured her.

Deanna flashed another winning smile. “I’ll be back soon.”

She rushed away. I looked at Lily to gauge her reaction. “Well?”

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