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“Yeah. I know I’m lucky.” I winced. “Some people don’t have that.”
“My mom was amazing,” he said wistfully, and when his eyes met mine, I smiled, happy he’d had that at least. “Which reminds me…” He reached behind him into the tent. “I started the book.”
My stomach flipped with excitement. “Yeah?”
He nodded. “I can only read during daylight, for obvious reasons, so I might be a bit slow getting it back to you.”
My stomach dropped. I hadn’t thought of that. That he might not have access to artificial light. “I could get you a book lamp or—”
“That’s not why I mentioned it,” he replied sternly.
“I was only suggesting—”
“I appreciate the offer, but please, don’t.” His cheeks were red, and his eyes had shuttered.
“Understood.” I got up so as not to crowd him, feeling guilty for even suggesting it. But his meaning was clear: I don’t want any handouts. I can fend for myself.
“Thank you,” he whispered.
I stared helplessly, afraid to make another wrong move. Maybe I had done too much, gotten too close. I was probably too invested at this point. But I couldn’t seem to help myself.
“I’m pretty fond of one of the quotes from the book,” he said, getting back to the subject at hand, and our eyes connected. “‘We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.’”
My mouth went dry. It was as if he was telling me his situation was temporary, that he still had aspirations. That he was indeed existing loudly, and suddenly I wanted him to recount all his dreams in vivid, bold detail.
7
LACHLAN
“I’m sorry it didn’t work out,” Tessa said when I stopped by her office after breakfast. But I could tell she either didn’t believe me or knew something disappointing had happened.
I certainly didn’t want to appear ungrateful. I hadn’t meant to squander the job opportunity. I just felt too out of place, but given my circumstances… “Maybe if another opportunity arises in a salon that isn’t so…like too much of a reminder of my old life.”
Her eyebrows rose to her hairline, but she didn’t push for details, and I appreciated that. “Noted.”
Returning to the main room, I felt a restless tension in the air as people tuned to the television mounted in the far corner, the volume turned up. It was normally set to The Weather Channel, and currently, they were warning about a wicked thunderstorm coming off the lake today.
I heard rumbles of people planning to shelter under the Main Avenue Bridge, but I’d been through many storms by now and wasn’t nervous. Unlike the sleet the other day, this sounded like it would blow through fast. My tent repelled rain pretty well, and no way I wanted to spend another night smashed together like sardines while we all waited it out.
I tuned out the chatter, considering where I might take my book to read this afternoon before the rain set in. I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed getting lost in fictional worlds, so maybe Foster would offer to bring me other things to read.
No. Bad idea. He’d done enough for me already, and I’d probably gotten too attached to his dog—and to my friendly exchanges with Foster as well. I couldn’t believe some of the things I’d shared with him. But he didn’t seem taken aback—maybe a little angry with Clint—and that had surprised me. Had even made my chest tighten in this strange way. But I didn’t need anyone to save me or fight for me. That was my job, and never before had it felt so evident. I had given up plenty of things for Clint, who was a controlling jackass and had taken advantage of my blind trust in him.
Guess that saying was true, that your parents were reflected in your romantic partners—namely, my father. Maybe it was the universe’s way of helping you work through some childhood trauma, or maybe it just felt all too familiar or comfortable, so you put up with the bullshit. Damn, that was messed up. Never again.
Foster treated me like a human being, like I had dignity, and that meant the world to me. Not that he was a romantic partner. Christ, no way I needed my thoughts to head in that direction. I had trouble as it was because he was so easy on the eyes.
It was definitely best to head to the public library if I wanted to read any more books. After I finished the one he’d lent me. On that note, I headed out.
I felt the first raindrop as I was sitting near the water fountain in Public Square. Supposed it was time to hunker down in my tent to wait out the impending storm. I briefly considered setting up right there, but I liked my little spot near the coffee shop best. And not only because of friendly strangers.
