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“No, this is part of my depression.” He rubbed his eyes. “Sometimes it’s not so much about being sad as about feeling depleted. You still have the feeling that all the color has been sucked out of the world, but it’s for different reasons. And this time, I think, I ended up doing too much, so I slid back a bit.”
“One foot forward, two steps back,” I said to myself. “What can I do?”
“Not your problem. Eventually, I’ll get my butt up and figure out my day.”
I sat down on the mattress and slid my fingers through his hair, trying to provide him the same sort of comfort he always did me. The man had saved me twice, had given me a place to live, and now my ex might press charges. He didn’t deserve any of that.
“You said you try to do things that bring you comfort when you feel like this.”
“Uh-huh.” His eyes were shut, but he was angling his head toward my hand as I continued to stroke his hair.
“Like how the shower feels on your skin?”
“Yeah, that’s a favorite, but I feel too weak to get up.”
I kissed his cheek. “I’ll help you.”
When I drew the covers back, he protested. “You don’t have to—”
“I want to.” Without a second thought, I scooped him up in my arms and carried him to the bathroom.
He must’ve been stunned silent because all he did was look up at me with wide eyes as he circled his arms around my neck.
“My knight in shining armor,” he teased when I propped him on the toilet seat, then fiddled with the handles in the shower.
I quickly disrobed, then pulled down his boxers so he could step out of them. We were both half-hard, but that wasn’t what this was about right now. This was about helping him feel human, something I’d needed help with many times.
“Come on, handsome.”
He held on to me as we stepped inside and under the spray. He sighed as soon as the water rolled over us. It did feel soothing, I’d give him that.
He propped his hands on my shoulders as I reached for the bodywash, squeezing a generous amount in my hand and then rubbing him from his chest down to his groin.
Foster watched me intently, panting shallowly against my cheek. His eyes seemed misty, but it was hard to tell because of the steam rising around us. When he sighed, I knew he was enjoying the extra attention I was giving his torso.
“Don’t let go of me,” I told him, then kneeled down to wash from his thighs to his feet, kissing each leg and ankle as I went. When I looked up at him, his eyes were shut as if in silent prayer, and I was glad I’d followed my instinct.
My face was in front of his groin, so I buried my nose in his wiry pubic hair to smell the essence of him, something that always made me feel alive and calm. His hand shook as he moved his fingers from my shoulder to burrow in my wet hair.
I kissed his cock reverently, my way of telling him how special he was, and when he groaned and shifted, I wondered if he also needed a release.
“Want me to… It’s okay if you don’t.” I squeezed his hip. “But it might feel good.”
He’d asked me to fuck him the other night, and from what I’d gathered, it had made him feel alive and human again. And damn, I got it. It was how I’d felt that first time I’d kissed him against the wall.
“Ah, hell…please.”
I palmed his dick as my tongue traced over the glans. He smelled like soap as I licked the length and sucked each ball into my mouth, his moans increasing with each pass of my tongue.
My fingers circled from his hips to his ass, and I gripped his cheeks as he thrust into my mouth. I hummed around his shaft as I felt it nudge the back of my throat.
I pulled off to catch my breath, then engulfed his cock again just as my fingers found his crease. I sucked his cock while my finger prodded at his rim, my dick growing painfully hard from all the sounds he was making. I adjusted my grip to slide a finger inside from behind his balls, and he shuddered. Keeping his cock in my mouth, I finger-fucked him, rubbing his prostate with every thrust.
“Holy hell!” he cried out as he stiffened and shot into my mouth. I looked up to watch him chase his orgasm, and it was so hot, I spurted onto the shower tile.
I caught my breath, then stood to take his mouth. “Gorgeous.”
“Thanks for that,” he murmured against my lips. “Felt amazing.”
“Whoa there, hang on to me.” I reached around his waist when his legs got wobbly.
