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In the end, I somehow concocted a story about how I’d decided to look for a job and I had to go alone and I wasn’t really sure where all I was going to apply because who knew? Maybe I’d end up seeing if some craft store in Pine River or a stamp store in Pine Valley were hiring? But I had to go alone because who’d want to hang out with me while I’m running in and out of stores, filling out applications? At that part, my cousins started to back off because that rang true for them. They didn’t want to do that with me. Clint was starting to sweat that I was going to try to talk him into applying with me. Which, if it’d been true, I would’ve.
Alex and Trenton backed off when they realized going with me would cause them to miss football practice.
They left after thirty minutes. I had Gem and Theresa to dodge next.
They turned out to be easier to talk around because I mentioned that Kira brought up Homecoming dates. Theresa was out at that point. She didn’t want to talk about that.
Gem was the last hold-out.
She wanted to talk about how we’re doing our hair for the dance.
That was when my phone buzzed.
Scout: Outside. You ready?
“I have to go,” I blurted.
She stopped mid-sentence, her face perplexed.
“I’m sorry. I-I have to go.” I grabbed what I needed from my locker and headed out.
Gem was walking with me. “You okay?”
I picked up speed.
So did she.
I went faster.
She matched me.
We were both almost sprinting for the door.
“Ramsay—hey. Wait.”
The door was right there. Within reach, and I looked out, seeing Scout waiting by the curb in his truck.
What was I doing? For real. What was I doing?
She was on the same wavelength because she asked, “What is going on with you? And don’t give me the same story about job applications. You know I’d go with you.” She rethought that. “You know I’d try to talk you into working at Mario’s. You said that to get your cousins off your back.”
“You think?”
She nodded, her eyes so somber. “I’m starting to get to know you, you know. Really know you. What’s going on? You can tell me.”
I didn’t trust friends. Family, yes. Everyone else? No. But, Gem picked me. She saw me and she chose me and she had no idea who I was. I . . . I didn’t know what Scout and I were doing. I didn’t know what it meant that he invited me to go to this fight with him, or that I was going, or that I was excited to go. It could mean I wanted to get away, get distracted even more from life, or it could mean other things, other things that frightened me as well.
But I had a sleepover with Gem, and I was closed off to letting her in.
I was realizing it now.
She was watching me, waiting for me, and I had a decision to make. Let her in or keep her out.
“I’m going to Portland with Scout.”
She gasped.
I wasn’t done. “We’re going to watch a fight.”
Another gasp.
I was going for broke here. “And we’ve been sleeping together.”
She careened backward and dropped. Literally. It was a hard thud as she hit the ground. “Wait. I’m good. Sorry. I’m up.” She shot a hand up before scrambling to her feet. “Sorry.” Her face was beet red. “I—Holy, holy, holy, holy, holy! I can’t believe what you just said!”
Steam was starting to rise from the top of her head.
Her eyes were bulging out. “You’re slee—”
I clamped a hand over her mouth, and she finished but her words were muffled against my palm. I still got, “Howyuckhowyuckhowyuck!”
I was guessing she was saying holy fuck.
I was holding my breath, waiting out her reaction as the door opened behind us. We’d turned around at some point, I’d not noticed, so I turned to see Scout coming in, a frown on his face. He spotted us and stopped half in, half out of the door, and Gem began shrieking. She clamped her own hand over her mouth, still making the same sound as she began jumping in place.
Scout’s eyes slid my way.
Her gaze kept bouncing from him to me, him to me, him to me, as she kept jumping, her hand clamped over her mouth.
He sighed. “Fucking hell.” He turned and left, the door swinging shut behind him.
Gem didn’t look like she was going to stop, so I reached out and caught her arm. “Please don’t tell anyone.”
She stopped jumping and began vigorously nodding, her hand still over her mouth.
I gave her a tentative grin before following because, what else was there for me to do? Had that been a good move or not?
So yeah.
All that happened, and that was why I forgot to ask him about Kira’s comment because when I got in his truck, I wasn’t thinking about Kira. I was thinking about Gem.
