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“But if he gives her happiness…” She grins. “The way you light up, the way you smile quietly to yourself, the way you talk about him—it’s a very good reflection, Asia.”
“Who’s to say that won’t change in five years or three months?” I gulp. “Or one month?”
“Honey, give yourself a chance to fall in love with your husband.” She kisses my forehead. “You might be surprised that what you thought you wanted was not what you needed.”
“And if you’re wrong? If we don't make it?”
Mom sighs. “That’s a risk we all have to take.”
Yeah, but is it a risk worth taking?
Twenty-Six
Hansley
Darkness creeps over the city. Inky shadows crawl through the streets below and swirl in the clouds overhead.
I’m up here.
On the highest floor.
In a building I own.
But I’m not immune to those clouds. To those shadows.
The darkness sucks me in.
Pulls me taunt.
Like a guitar string bound to snap.
I can’t move.
Haven’t been able to move since Svena left.
I’m pregnant.
Her words still pack a punch.
They still slam my gut with the precision of an assassin on his last hit.
I scrape the heel of my hands over my face.
That has to be a mistake.
I’m always careful. Always.
That was one responsibility I took over in any fling.
How could this have happened?
How could I have let this happen?
I’m pregnant.
No matter what, it doesn’t change the outcome. She thinks I’m the father and, if she’s right, I have no choice but to take responsibility. I’m not going to be like my sperm donor. I’m not going to make a kid, cause havoc and then leave the birth mother with no other choice than to give her baby away and then seek him out years later to call him ‘nothing’.
That’s not a freaking option.
