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“Shar was the only one who could get through to you. Through to both of us.”
Damn. All the grief I’d been trying so hard to push away charges over me like a bull about to impale a matador. I reach out and cling to the sink, digging on for dear life so I don’t fall.
“The stupid stunts you’ve pulled since she’s been gone—look, I get it. Anything to dull the pain, right? I’ve been there.”
“You don’t understand.”
“She was my sister, man. Don’t you think it would hurt me too? But you crossed a line this time, Hans. This is utter madness. This rampage of destruction and recklessness has to end. Shar would have hated to see you get this low because of her.”
I shake my head, unable to breathe. Unable to respond with an answer that will get Brett and his brotherly concern off my back.
My mind goes blank.
All I can see is Sharon, bravely smiling at me from her death bed. And me, standing at her side, the words I needed to say balling in my throat and refusing to spill out, clinging to me like a kid on his first day of pre-school clawing at his mother’s leg.
In the distance, I hear knocking on the door. Grateful for the distraction, I peer through the room to find Asia heading to answer it.
Brett’s voice is soft in my ears. “I don’t mean to be harsh. Do you… you know you can talk to me, Hansley.”
I don’t answer.
My mind has already shifted from this conversation.
I’ve already blocked him off.
That’s the only way I can gain back my equilibrium. Try to find my bearings.
I can’t get stuck on my regrets.
Can’t let thoughts of Shar pool the waters.
This is where I am now.
This is who I am now.
Who I always was.
A responsible screw-up.
‘Responsible’ because I never let anyone clean up my messes.
Asia and I can’t be married.
Not today.
Not ever.
She opens the door. Stiffens in shock.
Her slender, brown hands fall away from the knob and slam against her side like dancing balloons losing air. She gasps loudly, brown eyes widening.
My focus zones in on her until it feels like I can count her every breath.
Something’s wrong.
I dig my fingers into the phone. “I need to go.”
“Wait!”
