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“Well, I guess we’re not getting as much privacy as I hoped for,” I say. “That’s okay. Other people can hear if they want to.”
“What’s up?” she asks.
Is she just pretending, or is this really a surprise to her? I could believe either one about her. She’d definitely play it cool if she knew, but also, I could imagine her being a little bit oblivious to people being attracted to her.
“I just wanted to ask if you’d like to go out with me sometime,” I say. “I’d love a dinner date, but if you’d be more comfortable with coffee to start out with, that would be fine, too.”
She looks genuinely surprised. “When you say go out, do you mean, like… romantically?”
I smile. “Well, that’s what the date would decide, isn’t it?”
A group of kids who, for some unknown reason, have all decided to stomp as loud as they possibly can while shouting “Big step! Big step! Big step!” go down the hall. That’s elementary school for you.
She looks hesitant and uncomfortable, and I can feel my stomach sinking just a little. Sure, the risk of getting rejected is the price of asking someone out, but it’s still never fun. Especially when it’s by someone so kind and beautiful.
“I’m afraid I don’t think I’d be comfortable with that,” she says finally. “It’s not that I don’t think you’re very charming. I mean, you are. It’s just that I wouldn’t really be comfortable with it, you know, professionally.”
“You wouldn’t want it to interfere with our working relationship,” I offer.
“Exactly.” She’s obviously relieved that I’m not upset. “It would just get messy if things didn’t work out and… well, you understand.”
Of course, it is upsetting, but it won’t help anything to show it. I’m a little surprised by this setback, but I don’t think the game is over yet. I don’t think she was just being nice when she said I was very charming. She may not want a date now, but that just means I have to be patient.
Patient and charming.
“That makes total sense,” I say. “I also value our professional connection very highly.”
She nods. “The kids really do love you. Ryan is always talking about how much fun he’s having and how much he’s learning from you.”
“Ryan’s a great kid. He’s gotten so much more aggressive than he was when he started, and it’s really made a difference.”
“Oh, you have no idea how much he’ll love to hear you say that,” she replies. “He really does want to make you happy.”
“He’s not the only one. There’s so much enthusiasm on that team. I don’t think I expected that when I first volunteered for the position.”
“That’s kids,” she says. “They always surprise you. For better and worse.”
I laugh. “I bet as the school nurse, you get to see more than your share of the stupid side of kids.”
“You sure do. Just last week, there was a kid in my office who’d managed to get a staple in their thumb. Do you want to know how that happened?”
“Lemme guess. A friend bet them they wouldn’t put a staple in their thumb?”
“No, no, that would be silly. Obviously, the friend bet them five dollars that they could getcloserto putting a staple in their thumb without doing it than he could.”
The two of us laugh together. As we do, a flash of occasions when I did things every bit that dumb flash before my eyes. Some of them I ended up paying the price for. A lot of them, I didn’t.
“But you know, you get to see their good side, too,” she says suddenly. “You get to see kids helping each other and being supportive and trying their best to put on a tough face for all of it. Kids are complicated.”
“They sure are,” I agree. “It really makes you want to do your best for them.”
She looks at me as if she didn’t expect me to say that. “Yeah, it really does.”
It’s been long enough, I think. I’ve established that I’m not upset about her rejecting me any more. And, more importantly, I can probably try to steer the conversation back towards the idea of dating. I want to get a better idea of what she feels exactly. But also, I’m enjoying just talking about the kids with her. It’s good to know that someone else understands the feeling I’ve been having about teaching.
“How’d you end up becoming a nurse, anyway?” I ask. “Was it something you always wanted to do, or just something you found?”
“I went through a phase where I thought I wanted to be a doctor, like on TV,” she answers. “You know, ‘Nurse, get the paddles! He’s flatlining!’ But I had a cousin who was a teacher, and she talked about how schools needed nurses who actually listened to the kids, rather than just giving them a Band-Aid and sending them on their way, and I really liked that idea. I wanted to be there for kids when they needed someone.”
