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Which was exactly why I’d left.
Why I’d turned down the job.
Why I couldn’t see Knox again.
Granted, I’d freaked out. But I knew I’d made the right decision. Because it would be too painful to know what it was like to be with him while trying to accept that it could never happen again.
And Jude… God.Jude.There was no way I could ever face him after last night.
It was best to end things now. To leave. Before someone got hurt.
BeforeIgot hurt.
“Kendall,” Joe said, careful to keep his voice low. “If you won’t go home, at least go to the cafeteria.”
“Okay.” I stood, knowing he was right. “Do you want anything?”
“I’ll get something later,” he said.
I nodded and wandered down the hall in a zombie-like state. My phone buzzed with a new message, but I didn’t even bother glancing at the screen. Knox had texted me on and off throughout the morning, and I didn’t know how to respond.
What I really needed was to talk to Emmy. So I headed to the cafeteria to grab some breakfast and call her about…well, everything. I was on my way there when I spotted Jude. He was carrying a vase of flowers and scanning the hallway.
I panicked, my heart racing. I tried to turn to go a different way, but it was too late. He’d already spotted me, and he was smiling.
“Kendall. I’m so glad I found you.”
“Jude?” I gaped at him, wondering if I was delusional. Was the universe mocking me? “What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to come check on you. And bring these to your mom.” He held up an enormous vase of flowers. Cheerful and bright, just like her.
“That’s so sweet of you. But…” I frowned. “How did you know we were here?”
“I had brunch with Dad this morning, and he mentioned that your mom was admitted. So I checked on social media.”
I lifted my chin but stayed silent. I wondered if Knox had mentioned anything else.
I was still processing everything when Jude opened his arm for a side hug. I hesitated. Hugging Jude after sleeping with Knox just felt…wrong.
“I, um, haven’t showered.” I tucked my hair behind my ear.
And I slept with your dad.
“I like it when you’re dirty.” He winked, which only made me feel worse. About sleeping with Knox. About the way Jude was flirting with me, despite having a girlfriend. “Get over here.”
The walls were pressing in on me, the drab color making my temples throb and pulse. And the fact that I still hadn’t hugged Jude was getting increasingly awkward. So, seeing no other option, I stepped into his open embrace.
“Sorry.” I gave him a hug, feeling as if I were somehow betraying Knox even though I didn’t owe him anything. “My manners seem to have gone missing.”
Along with my morals.
Why did I feel worse about hugging Jude than having sex with his dad?
Jude chuckled, giving me a quick squeeze. “I get it. If it were my dad in the hospital…” He shook his head, and bile rose in my throat.
Oh god.If Jude knew the truth…
“Ken?” Jude asked, placing his hand on my lower back. “Are you okay? You’re white as a sheet.”
