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“Are you even hearing yourself?” I asked, stupidly trying to wake him up from this darkness he'd pushed himself into. But I couldn’t care less for what happened to me next. He needed help, and for Cillian’s sake, I hoped he would take it. I hoped he would hear what everyone around him was trying to tell him.
Ava wasn’t stable, and he'd allowed her to pull him into the darkness she'd surrounded herself with.
“She was using you, Tristan,” I said. “And if it came down to it, she would’ve killed you as well. She would’ve abandoned you.”
“No! You have no idea what you’re talking about!”
“I know enough,” I murmured, looking him straight in the eye. “I know that Cillian never wanted it to come to this. He loves you, always will, but you need to stop behaving like a toddler that’s throwing tantrums because someone took away his favorite toy.”
The roar that erupted from him should’ve scared me, and I braced myself for impact, because there was no way he wouldn’t strike me. I closed my barely open eye and waited for the pain, but it never came. I felt him moving away from me, and as I opened my eye again, he was standing next to Eddie, looking at me while his chest rose and fell, and a puzzled look took over his face.
“She’s all yours,” he murmured barely above a whisper, looking at me as if he was saying goodbye. For a second there, regret flashed over his face, but it was soon replaced by the indifference he masterfully wore, and before I could even say anything, he left me all alone with the one monster I always wanted to kill.
With the man that hurt me more than anyone else ever did.
And that fear I was talking about? It rushed back in full force when I looked at the crooked grin on Eddie’s face. And as he slowly approached me, taking his sweet time, his eyes raking over my body, I felt sick to my stomach, knowing what was about to come.
Knowing that he wouldn’t mind destroying my body to show me that I belonged to him.
Even though I didn’t.
What I thought was love, was nothing but passion, masked as the feeling I was constantly chasing, trying to find a place to call my own. For a moment he was that place, until he'd shown me his true face, and I was too weak to get out, to run away from the man that used my body as a punching bag.
“Stay away from me, Eddie,” I gritted out, bracing myself for the viciousness he was no doubt going to unleash on me. I'd put him in prison. I'd destroyed his life, and I knew that the anger gleaming in his eyes would make him do what he always wanted to do.
But Eddie had no idea that I wasn’t a weak little girl anymore. I wasn’t going to sit here and let him do whatever the fuck he wanted to do.
I was going to fight, no matter what.
18
EVELYN
The smell of cheap beer,cigarettes and sweat enveloped me as Eddie pushed his face to the crook of my neck, inhaling me, while his hands skimmed over my sides, sending shivers of terror all over my body.
I hated this weakness, this incapability to do anything to stop him.
“You smell like lavender,” he groaned, and even his voice made me want to puke all over the dirty floor of this warehouse. My eyes searched the dark space where Tristan had disappeared, hoping he would stop this insanity, but maybe I pushed him too far.
I said things I shouldn’t have said, and he left me alone with the monster that haunted my dreams, that destroyed my life and my sanity, just because he wasn’t capable of hearing the truth. Tristan was just an overgrown baby, blaming everyone else for his mistakes and for Ava’s mistakes. And if the bitch was still alive, I would’ve killed her myself for the shit she left behind.
“I missed you, baby,” Eddie kept on talking, dragging his sleazy hands over my body, as if he had any right to do so. I pressed my legs tighter together, closed my eyes, imagining I was somewhere far away from here, but the mere scent of him made it impossible. There was no escape, there were no memories that could help me through this. “You fucked me over, Eve,” he mumbled, biting into the skin on my shoulder, tearing away the strap of my sports bra, licking over my exposed flesh. “You’ve been a very bad girl, baby.” God, I wanted to punch him, to kill him, to rip him apart just how he'd ripped my soul apart, but I couldn’t do shit with my legs tightly tied up to the chair.
My head was too fuzzy to stay awake, but I knew that if I slipped into oblivion, he would do unthinkable things to me, and I wouldn’t be able to fight him. So I fought against the current threatening to sweep over me, pulling me into a deep slumber, and I opened my eyes just in time to see him right in front of me, the face I once loved looking down at me with so much hatred, shaking me to my core.
“We could’ve been so happy, Eve,” he crooned, dragging his thumb over my swollen cheek, pressing against the sore spot. “We could’ve had a family, but you went and screwed it all up.”
You killed our baby!I wanted to scream at him, I wanted him to feel the pain I felt, but I knew it would be useless. Eddie didn’t feel remorse over his actions. It was obvious when he'd shown up at the hospital, when I'd started screaming to get him the fuck away from me. That he was a murderer.
He was only upset because people finally found out who he really was. That he wasn’t an upstanding citizen of Croyford Bay as he wanted everyone to believe. Monsters only got angry once they were caught. They didn’t care about other people’s feelings, or the destruction they left behind.
And Eddie… He managed to fool everyone, but I was the one to shake his world, to show them who he truly was.
He pulled out a small pocket knife and cut through the zip ties wrapped around my wrists, but I didn’t dare move. I wanted him to think that he had me, that he could do everything he wanted to do with me. I wanted him so sure of himself as I gathered all my anger, and all my pain inside my bones, wrapping it into a tightly coiled ball in the center of my chest.
He ran the blade of the knife over my collarbone, rising up toward my face, over my eyebrow, landing right underneath my one open eye, toying with me like he always did.
“You were always such a pretty girl,” he murmured, smiling down at me as if what he was doing was normal. “And you always belonged to me.”
