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The one who had always been my shoulder to cry on. My safe place. The one who wouldn’t even touch me until I was eighteen because he felt the four-year age gap was too significant at the time.
The one I ran to until he stopped coming.
That sweet boy wasn’t the man standing in front of me now.
But even though it wasn’t him, I was still drawn to his presence. Or maybe I just wanted answers. If I could understand why, then I might stop having these nightmares. Stop dreaming of a future that had never happened.
“Well…” My skin felt hot. I was suddenly hyper-aware of everyone staring at us. Of his gaze piercing me in place. “Maybe we could catch up. Talk.”
He scoffed as he looked down at me. I felt like a bug. Like gum on the bottom of his shoe. He’d never made me feel like that before. Back then, I’d felt precious. Cherished. Loved.
“I have nothing to say to you.”
And without another word, he walked away. He made it seem so easy. Like I had been nothing to him.
I guess I should be satisfied. It was more than I’d gotten last time.
But the ache in my chest was the same. Like the hole in my heart had never truly disappeared. It had only scabbed over. And now, he’d ripped it open again.
7
Adam
My blood still felt like it was boiling as I ran the towel through my hair. It seemed nothing was going to get rid of this feeling. Not spying on Gio. Not sparing with Matteo’s guards. Not even a kill.
Ariella was back. Looking at me like she always had. Like I still had a heart.
But I didn’t. She’d ripped it from my body. Stomped on it until it was nothing but a smear on the sidewalk.
As I stared in the mirror, my eyes fell to the tattoo on my chest. It was a black-and-white sketch of a field covered in flowers. A couple holding hands as the moonlight shined on them. Ariella had sketched it after our first night together.
I’d gotten it tattooed the day before everything came crashing down. I was trying to show her how serious I was about being with her. Having our baby. It was supposed to represent us. Our bond. Our Love. Our promises.
Now, it reminded me to never trust again. That life is agony. There was no love for me here.
Pain shot through my arm as I struck. The glass shattered. Blood mixed into the reflections as it dripped from my hand. Even the ache wasn’t enough to distract from the agony in my chest.
She was supposed to be gone. Married off like her father planned. Even if the idea had crossed my mind and I knew she would be here, I didn’t expect to feel this way. To feel the affection I once had for her burned away by my rage of what she’d done.
All the years, and I couldn’t forgive her. Even if I now understood she was a child then. She wasn’t ready to have one. It still didn’t stop the betrayal of knowing she’d killed mine.
I took slow breaths as I pressed my hands into the counter. I closed my eyes, willing it to stop. My fingers dug into the cool marble as my head fell forward. But nothing stopped the memories from coming.
No. No. No.
Terror clawed at my chest as I raced through the parking lot. Rain bounced off my clothes, but I barely noticed as I saw the emergency room sign. My knuckles burned from the beating I’d been giving when I’d gotten the call. I’d left the man with two holes in his stomach as I raced to get to her.
On the short drive, a million scenarios ran through my head. All Matteo had told me was that Ariella was in the hospital.
Had her father beaten her after finding out about the baby? Was something wrong with the baby? Were they even alive?
My guts twisted at the thought. They had to be. There was no other option. Besides Matteo, they were all I had in this world. All I needed.
My shoes slid across the tile as I ran down another hall. I left a trail of water behind me as I rushed to her. The pain in my chest finally lessened as I turned the last corner. Britney came into view, standing in front of a door marked doctor’s only.
I gripped her shoulders as I jerked to a stop. “Is she okay?”
My voice shook. My body vibrating with panic. Britney’s eyes rounded as she stared at me. “She’s fine. But—.”
