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Maybe if I touched her like I did in my dreams. Kept her close and safe; they would stop plaguing me. Maybe I could sleep again without her ruining it.
Without waking up and wishing she was next to me. Wishing I was still naïve enough to believe it was where she belonged.
12
Ariella
Icould see the light behind my eyelids but refused to open them. My head felt heavy and fuzzy like I was in a dream. And I wasn’t ready to leave it.
I knew what I would find when I woke up. I’d be alone in my bed. Wishing it wasn’t empty. That I wasn’t empty inside.
I didn’t want to face it right now. I didn’t want to feel the loneliness choking me. Or the regret twisting my gut.
I wanted to stay in my dream where Adam was back. It was only flashes, the dream slipping away as day came. But I remembered him picking me up from a club. The safety of being in his arms again.
I could still feel his calloused hands on me. I whimpered as he collared my throat. My body arched into his touch. I was on fire, burning for him to keep going. I could hear his chuckle in my head as his hand moved down.
“Yes.” I breathed as he cupped my breasts. I clenched my thighs together as his thumb brushed my nipple over and over until it was hard and aching for relief.
This was the most vivid dream I’d ever had about him. His touch felt real, and I wanted more. I wanted it all before I woke up. Before the pain would come.
His hand landed on my thigh, making my skin tingle and warm under his touch. I spread my legs, giving his large frame the space he needed. My dress rode up my thighs as I felt him settle between them.
The breath caught in my lungs as a single finger traced my center. I could feel the wetness coating my panties as I lifted my hips, giving him permission. Not that he had to ask for it.
I was always more than willing to be with Adam. It was me who’d begged for two years before we finally slept together. He was the only man I’d had and the only one I’d ever wanted.
I lifted my ass and wiggled my hips as he pulled my panties down my legs. Goosebumps broke out along my skin as the lace scraped against me. It must be the alcohol that was making my dream feel this visceral. I squeezed my eyes tighter, not wanting to wake up. I didn’t want to lose his touch. His warmth as his hands skimmed down my legs.
I whimpered as he kissed his way up my body. I felt his lips on my calf. My knee. My thighs. His rough stubble added another sensation, making me moan. I shivered as his breath ghosted over my dripping wet pussy.
“Please.” I sighed.
Please let me make it to the end of the dream. Let me have him again, if only in my mind.
His mouth closed around my clit, sucking hard. Ecstasy shot through my veins. The pleasure so overwhelming my eyes flew open.
But he didn’t go away.
I wasn’t alone. He was actually here. And he was touching me.
“W-what are you doing?” I gasped as he circled my clit with his tongue. My entire body jerked under his touch. My thighs clenched around his face as my hips rolled.
He didn’t answer. He didn’t stop. His only response was the way his blue eyes pierced me. Watching as his mouth held me in place. As he licked every inch of me.
Deep down, I knew this was wrong. I couldn’t remember if I’d given him consent. And the last time we spoke, he made it very clear he wanted nothing from me anymore.
I should stop him. We were both going to regret this when we sobered up. But I couldn’t resist. It had been so long since I’d felt like this. Since someone had worshiped my body. Not since my last time with Adam.
He was everything I hadn’t let myself want. Everything I’d been craving for years. A release I was long overdue for.
So, instead of resisting, I gave in. I threaded my fingers in his hair as I lifted my hips, pressing my center further into his mouth. My other hand gripped the sheets as he thrust his tongue inside me.
My pussy tightened around him. Pleasure flooded my veins as he loved me like he always had. Hitting all the right spots. The ones I’d discovered with him.
It wasn’t exactly the same as before. There was an edge to his touch now. A roughness he’d never had.
His fingers bruised, digging into my thighs as he held me in place. His tongue speared me over and over like he wanted it to hurt. But it didn’t stop me from enjoying it. If anything, it made it better.
