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My body trembled. Sweat slid down my spine. I breathed deep, and it seemed like I could still smell her. Still hear her.
My hand was outstretched like I was reaching for her. Like I had her here with me. But I didn’t. Even when she was here, I’d never really had her.
I’d thought I did. Thought she’d loved me as deeply as I loved her. But I’d been wrong.
In the end, she left like everyone else.
I ran my hands through my hair, cradling my head as I tried to shake the last of the memories away. I hadn’t had one this visceral in years. Being in this place was fucking with me.
At least I’d woken up this time. My nightmare didn’t lead me back into that house to find my mother’s body hanging from a ceiling fan. The best night of my life turning into one of the worst.
I yanked the covers from my body. Throwing my feet over the side of the bed, I stalked around the room. Shoving my legs into pants before searching for a shirt. The knife was heavy in my hand as I yanked the bedroom door open. My body vibrated with the excess energy.
I needed a fuck or a kill to rid myself of these feelings. Who was I kidding? I hadn’t fucked in years. The only thing touching my dick was my goddamn hand.
A kill it was then. Hopefully, there was enough left of our prisoner to satisfy me. It needed to be vicious. Sick. Vile to erase the feeling of love pumping through my veins. To remind myself of what I now was.
The devil.
3
Ariella
My hand moved along the paper as the sky outside lightened ever so slightly. Going from the deep black of night to a dark gray. Soon, it would be lit up with colors before eventually landing on blue.
I’m sure it was beautiful. I could sketch it again like I’d done a hundred times. It wouldn’t hurt like the drawing I was working on now did. It wouldn’t drag up painful memories.
Or I could work on any number of pieces I was being paid to create. I had a few logos waiting for me. A book cover. Even an email asking for a response about illustrating some spicy book scenes.
But I ignored it all as my fingers flew across the page, drawing the nightmare that had woken me. Two figures, a man and a woman, stood in a field. It was covered in flowers. The girl had one like a ring on her finger. The man’s hand lingered on her stomach.
As I drew, the memories flooded my mind.
Branches whipped across my skin as I ran through the woods. Tears streamed down my face as I tried to get to him. If I could see him, than I could breathe again.
I felt my lungs expand as I burst from the tree line. His red hair seemed brighter in the moonlight. I could almost feel his blue eyes piercing me from across the distance.
Adam caught me in his arms as I stumbled towards him. Just this simple touch and I felt myself calming. My chest loosened as he hugged me closer.
“What’s wrong, nightling?” He cupped my cheeks, brushing away the tears.
“I-I.” I couldn’t say it. Couldn’t ruin his life.
But how could I not tell him about the baby growing inside me?
“I’m pregnant.” I gasped, my knees trying to give out.
How could I let this happen? I mean, I knew how it had happened. But I couldn’t be this stupid. Not when the consequences were so severe.
I was only nineteen. We’d only officially been together a year. We weren’t ready for this.
These were all big problems, but nothing compared to what my father would do when he found out I’d ruined myself.
“It’s okay.” Adam’s eyes rounded as he pulled me closer. He whispered in my ear. Soothing me until I wasn’t hysterical. Until I could actually talk through the sobs.
“How is it going to be okay?” I swiped at the tears. My stomach rolled as I thought about what my father would do to Adam when he found out.
Gio DiCostawas a Capo in the Gallo Mafia. He wouldn’t like that a non-Italian had touched his precious eldest daughter. The one he planned to marry off as soon as she turned twenty-one. The daughter that was supposed to stay a virgin until then.
