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I sneak around the building to the back, where her bedroom light is on. Her curtains are always open. They have been since she was little, scared of the dark and terrified of what hid in the shadows. I told her the moon was the best kind of nightlight, and all she had to do was keep her curtains open so it would keep the monsters away. Yet here I am, a monster hiding in the shadows like she feared.
She walks past the window, still talking on the phone; her face lights up as she laughs aloud. A sound that lightens even the darkest of my moods. It’s one of the many reasons I come here after every bad day, to see and hear her just long enough to take away a tiny bit of the never-ending pain from missing her.
It’s been five years to the day since I was forced to walk away from my girl.
“She is too pure for your world. Please don’t drag her into the dark with you. Leave her to have the happy, carefree life you know she deserves. Stay away and protect her,”my best friend begged me, making me see the truth. I am not good enough for her; I will never be good enough. He told me the best thing I could do was stay away and let her think I was gone. So, I did. Now, I’m forced to watch the woman I love, live her life without me. I hide in the dark of the night and keep an eye out from afar, ensuring she has everything she needs without knowing it’s me providing it.
She walks to the window and stands with the small lamp behind her, helping me to stay hidden in the dark, where I belong. I watch as she puts her phone down and starts to play with the pendant on her necklace as she does when she is lost in thought—the necklace I gave her five years ago.
I’ve never seen her without it; from what I hear, she never takes it off. Is she thinking of me when she plays with it? Does she think of me when she sees it in her reflection? She lifts the pendant and presses it to her mouth. I touch my lips and wonder what it would be like to be the one she kisses. To feel those soft full lips against mine. She looks down at the pendant before her shoulders sag and walks away from the window, blinking a little more rapidly than before.
I watch from the shadows as the lamp dims and know she’s curled up for the night with a book in bed. I stay for a short while, just needing to be in her presence, even if she has no idea I’m there. After twenty minutes, the light switches off, and I know she’s drifting off to sleep.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I pull it out to answer.
“Yeah?”
“Where are you?” his voice comes down the line, and I sigh. He always fucking knows.
“Out.” I snap as I move further away from the building, hoping she won’t hear me. She doesn’t usually, but I can never be too careful.
“You are there, aren’t you?” he sighs as my jaw clenches with frustration.
“If you knew, then why ask?”
“If she catches you…”
“She hasn’t yet. I’m not fucking stupid,” I growl through gritted teeth as I walk towards my car.
“Harry said you had him watch the place last night?”
Fuck. I make a mental note to have a fucking word with that snitch. He’s a great bodyguard, but sometimes he forgets he should be more loyal to me than him.
“I had a bad feeling; I wanted her checked on. Is it so bad that I want to be sure she’s safe?”
I hear him sigh again and roll my eyes.
“You know I want her safe, too. That’s why I ask you to stay away.”
I climb into my car and slam the door shut.
“And I fucking have. She hasn’t seen or heard from me in five years! What more do you want me to do? I can’t stay away any more than I already am.”
There is silence down the line for a moment, and I know he will be keeping quiet before we end up having a massive argument, as we do at this time every year.
“Just be careful, for both your sakes. I hate watching you doing this to yourself, but I will always protect her, even from you.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose and close my eyes, trying desperately to calm myself.
“I’m protecting her from me too.” And I am. I will always protect her, even if that means hiding in the shadows like the crazy ass stalker I am.
I quickly say bye to my friend and hang up before he can lecture me anymore. I let out a deep sigh and lean back in the driver’s seat, turning my head to the right and looking up at the building once more before turning on the engine and driving the car. With one last glance at the building, I turn the car onto the road, whispering what I wish I could say aloud.
“Happy birthday, princess.”
Chapter Two
Gabby
