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“Really?” Sutter looked affronted. “I didn’t know that. Are age players excluded for a reason?”
“I don’t think so. It was hard to ask questions directly, but I overheard some things that made me think our type of play wasn’t welcome.”
“Huh.” Sutter chewed on his lower lip. Then his grin stretched and it was a sly thing. “That’s tempting, isn’t it? Makes me want to try to get in.”
Saoirse laughed. “Forbidden fruit?”
“Exactly.” He picked up her hand from where it was resting on her thigh and kissed her knuckles again. “I should have asked, is this okay? Displays of affection? We haven’t talked through all your limits.”
They’d started the discussion, dipping in and out of it in a natural way Saoirse found comforting. A few questions over the steak dinner. A few more during the seventh inning stretch of the baseball game. A text here and there. Saoirse loved that Sutter was slowly learning her boundaries without sitting her down for a “big talk” which would have made her Little retreat.
“P.D.A. isn’t among them,” Saoirse reassured him. “It’s nice. I haven’t had anyone to be affectionate with in public in a really long time.”
“No?” His brow furrowed. “Is that because you couldn’t be yourself at Blunts?”
Saoirse nodded. “I’d started having these feelings at M Street, but they were just that… feelings. I wasn’t ready to act on them. Then I got the offer for the temp position at Blunts and thought it would be the perfect place to explore. But it was absolutely the opposite.” She shuddered. “It wasn’t just unwelcome. Most of the Doms there were great, but a few made me really uncomfortable. Not just about Littleness, about everything. It felt… predatory.”
Sutter rubbed his thumb in comforting circles over her knuckles. “I’m sorry, darlin’. Were you scared?”
“A few times,” Saoirse admitted. “Nothing so bad that I could go to the Chairman with it, but enough that I avoided those guys whenever I could. And I never agreed to scene with them. Is that a rule at your club? That submissives can refuse to scene for any reason… or no reason? That’s important.”
“I think so, but I’ll double-check. I agree, it is important. This is my first time seeing the inner workings of one of Aunt Suzanna’s clubs, so it’ll be a learning trip for me, too.”
“Is that because they’re so far away in England?”
Sutter winked at her. “No, darlin’, it’s because I was underage.”
Saoirse’s mouth gaped. “You, uh, how old are you?”
“I turned twenty-two in May.”
“Bu-but, you said you went to business school. I thought that took years. I figured you were twenty-five at least.”
Sutter kissed her knuckles again. “I took an accelerated course. Five years for my B.A. and M.B.A. combined. Why does it matter?”
“Because I’m adecadeolder than you. I’d graduated college while you were still in elementary school.”
“Not quite,” he said. “My father was ten years older than my mother. It raised a few eyebrows but no one voiced any objections. Is it because the guy is supposed to be older, more mature? So he can take care of his woman? Because I promise you that has nothing to do with age and everything to do with mind-set.”
Saoirse chewed on her lower lip, feeling an unpleasant mix of discomfort and chagrin.I should have asked him before now. She also knew it wouldn’t have made as much of an impact if he’d been ten years older than her. She hated sexual double-standards, having felt them keenly during her entire career. She actively redirected her mind whenever she found herself espousing one that had been ingrained without her realizing it. That’s what she did now.
“You’re right,” she said slowly. “If it was the other way around, no one would object. I’m sorry, it just caught me off guard. I won’t let it bother me.”
Sutter tipped his head as he looked at her. Warmth filled his eyes, like summer sunlight on leaves, and Saoirse found herself mesmerized by his gaze. “Did you do that—change your mind like that—for me?”
She nodded. “And because I hate sexual double-standards.”
“But mostly for me?”
She grinned. “Sure, mostly for you.”
Chapter 7
The wonder in Saoirse’s wide, dark eyes made the trip to the South Bank, jet lagged and with London’s unpredictable weather against them, utterly worthwhile.
The view is pretty spectacular, Sutter thought, looking at the woman beside him rather than following her gaze as she stared down the Thames at Big Ben. Even with chilly rain spattering against the pod’s glass, the panoramic view from the London Eye kept her riveted throughout the ride.
Strands of Saoirse’s glossy black hair stuck to her cheeks and neck from the cloudburst they’d been caught in as they walked from the Tube. The dull midday light paled her skin to bronze. But it couldn’t dim the wonder in her eyes, the flush across her carved cheekbones as she looked around excitedly. She was wearing his trench coat, since she hadn’t brought one, over a sundress splashed with poppies and sturdy, strappy sandals. Having never seen her in a dress before, Sutter was enraptured. Although he tried not to crowd her, he couldn’t help moving with her as she shifted around the pod to look through the different windows, tangling their fingers together or slipping his arm around her.
