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My breath hitches in my lungs, and my heart rate picks back up again. Chris loves me. This sex god, heartthrob who has half the world idolizing him, loves me.
And yet I know that there’s so much more to him than that. He’s funny, creative, passionate, and so, so tender.
“I don’t want you to change who you are,” I murmur against his lips. “I want you, Chris Müller. I love you. I love your passion and your tattoos and your quiet moments. I was just scared. I was scared that I’d fall in love with you and lose you. And I know that it’s still a possibility. But I have to trust you—I do trust you. Don’t give up everything for me.”
“I’m not,” he says. “I’m giving up some of the bad things in my life so I can have better things. Good things. If anything, Ram and Alwin get it. The chance to have love, to have a family. That matters. It’s bigger than Verduistering.”
Chris kisses me. It’s sweet and gentle, and this, right here, with the candlelight flickering around us and the smell of soft, powdery roses in the air, is the romantic moment Chris was going for.
A romantic moment I’ve never had before.
I pull back before he can kiss me again. “Will you grow your hair back out?”
He chuckles low and drops my hands, running his palms up the outside of my thighs and my hips to my waist, where he dips beneath my top to touch my bare skin. “I’ll grow it out again,” he promises.
“And ditch the loafers?”
Instead of answering me, he kisses me again. It’s open mouth and more forceful, pressing me back as his arms circle my waist.
“And maybe a bit of eye makeup, occasionally.”
Chris kisses deeper, his tongue entering my mouth and his hands sliding down to my ass. I wrap my arms around his neck, and the kissing is slow and tender, but our bodies are flush, his growing erection pressing into me and his tongue stroking my mouth and . . .
I yank back, my eyes wide. “You took out your barbell?”
Chris grins and sticks his tongue out. There’s no glint of metal, just a small indent.
“Put it back!”
This time I get a full-on laugh. “You like my tongue ring?” The question is low and sexy, and he doesn’t give me time to answer before he’s kissing me again.
When we come back up for air, I’ve almost forgotten what we were talking about, but it’s so weird to kiss Chris without the piercing.
“Seriously, how long do you have till it closes up?”
“We’ve got lots of time, I promise. I’ll pop it back in soon so I can do that thing you like—”
A throat clears from the hallway. “I’m still here.”
Chris and I reluctantly pull apart. “Okay, it’s safe to come back in now,” I say.
Zoe twirls around the corner and launches herself at me. I embrace my daughter, tears springing to my eyes. I didn’t think I would see her again until the end of her year abroad.
“How did you get here?” I ask when we pull apart.
Zoe offers her hand to Chris, and he high-fives it. “Chris and I flew here together, and I have a flight back in two days. Mom, we flew first class.”
I raise an eyebrow at Chris, who wraps his arm around my shoulders. “Are you spoiling my daughter?”
He shrugs. “She was helpful, and I thought you might like to spend some time together, too.”
“After all,” Zoe says. “You’re so far away now. You won’t get to see me as often.” She looks up at me, giving me sad puppy dog eyes.
When I roll my eyes, she lets her lip tremble.
“I’m trying to give you space,” I protest.
“You’re missing all your weekends with my aunts.”
