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Chris sits on his yoga mat—on top of a bolster to elevate his hips—and I make the final adjustments. Our yoga mats are perpendicular to the camera, parallel to each other, with Chris at the front left and me to the back right.
I check the setup one last time; there are already over a hundred people waiting, but I don’t tell Chris that. I don’t want him to be nervous trying something new in front of so many people.
A few more clicks, and the music is on. It’s a simple, slow bass rhythm Chris recorded, just enough to feel electric but slow enough that it’s not frantic.
It makes me feel a little badass, and I want to use it for all my yoga sessions now.
I’ve got my remote clicker, and I settle into Sukhasana, cross-legged on the floor, and glance over at Chris, who’s been watching me.
“Ready?” I ask.
“Ready.” He nods and turns back to the camera.
I take a deep breath, in and out, relax my face, and smile. I click the button, the red light turns on, and I greet the watchers.
“Hello and welcome to our first session of Rock Steady. I’m Sara Wallace. Thank you for supporting my Patreon and this project. You may know this man next to me as Chris Rächer, but today he’s my beginner student. Chris, have you done yoga before?”
“This is my first time.” I can’t see his face, but his voice is calm and natural. Of course, he’s good at this; I’ve watched him in dozens of interviews.
“That makes me a yogi to the stars now.”
“Someone callPeoplemagazine,” Chris deadpans.
“Maybe work on your bandmates first. We can have a session together before your next concert.” I wink at the camera. “All right, so given that Chris is new to yoga, we’re going to go over a lot of basics. Session two will reinforce those basics and add some intermediate balance poses. Then we’ll have four videos of yoga routines set to rock music, composed and played by Chris. He’ll stick to basic moves, and I’ll do more advanced options.
“I want to note that Chris has a lot of upper body strength—” He flexes in front of me and kisses his bicep. “—and I have more flexibility, so you’ll be able to see the wide variety that yoga covers. Ready, Chris?”
He claps his hands together into prayer. “Ready.”
I take us through breathing, some light stretching, and then into sun salutations. When Chris is in downward dog, I get up and gently adjust his poses, explaining to the viewers what I’m doing and why.
We expect that most people watching are pretty new to yoga and may have come in just to watch Chris or hear the music, but that’s okay. My goal is for these sessions to be entertaining and informative and for yoga to come across as badass.
Chris does great, holding poses without complaint, even when his muscles tremor slightly and sweat rolls down his temple.
“Okay, and now back to Warrior One,” I say. Chris slowly raises his arms over his head, and I straighten them up. “You can see how we’ve still got a straight line here.” I lean across his body to the side facing the camera and intend to trace a line from his hands to his hips without touching him, but my finger accidentally grazes just below his armpit, and Chris jerks toward me, flailing. “Argh!”
He tilts, and his arms windmill but I’m in the way, and we both end up on the floor, Chris nearly on top of me.
“Sorry! Sorry,” I say.
“You tickled me,” he accuses. His expression is dour but twitching. He’s trying not to laugh.
“I didn’t know you were so ticklish,” I say from the floor beneath him.
I look at the camera from the ground. “Okay, well, we’ve learned two things there. One, Chris is ticklish, so use that information as you see fit, everyone, and two, it’s okay to fall down as long as you get back up.”
Chris takes the hint and stands up, offering me a hand.
“Back to Warrior One,” I say, and Chris shakes his head.
We finish the rest of the session. There’s no more tickling—accidental or otherwise—and Chris looks great in all the poses, as I knew he would.
“Finally, put your hands to your third eye, and bow. Namaste, and thank you for attending the first Rock Steady.”
Chris waves while I grab the remote and turn the recording off.
I immediately flop onto my back. “Oh my god.”
