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“Please,” she whispers.

I line up and shove in. Her eyes roll back, and she bites her lips to keep from moaning.

“No.” I tighten my grip on her neck and shake it. “This is the last fucking time. I want to hear it.”

“Oh god, oh god, oh god . . .” Sara chants.

I piston my hips in and out, building momentum. With every thrust, Sara moves forward just a few centimeters. When her hips are flush against the beveled edge of the counter, I go harder, grunting with every thrust while Sara keens beneath me.

Her hands stretch out and grip the far side of the counter, which gives me an idea. I back away, pulling her with me by her hips until we’re in the middle of the kitchen.

“Grab your fucking ankles.”

I’ve seen Sara in this pose so many times before. Her legs spread and she bends in half, stretching her hamstrings and wrapping her fingers around her ankles.

Like this, I’m not pounding her into the counter; I’m gripping her hips and slapping us together. It’s deep and rough, and the kitchen fills with the sound of Sara’s wailing and my grunts. She’s begging relentlessly now, and I watch as my cock goes in and out of her. Cream from her pussy glistens, and I grit my teeth, trying to hold on to the giant, looming orgasm.

Sara shatters, crying out and clenching around me. I shout, slamming in a few more times before I unleash my own release, the surge of heat rolling from my toes to my cock.

Sara’s legs start to shake, and I grip her harder to keep us both upright. Which works for the thirty seconds it takes for us to slowly slump down onto the floor.

My sweat-slicked skin sticks to the floor. Sara’s on her side next to me, breathing hard.

I’ve never had sex like that before. I’ve never cared enough about someone to be a complex ball of emotions.

The anger and frustration have slipped away, and as Sara stands up and slips off to the bathroom, I lie on the kitchen floor, realizing that all that’s left in my body, the only thing I feel as I come down from my post-orgasm high, is sadness.

35

Sara

“So,let me get this straight: you had rough, hot, banging sex on the kitchen floor, and then you packed your stuff and snuck out?”

Tessa stares at me from her kitchen in Tavira. I got to my house after eighteen hours of travel time, crashed for six hours, and am now up in the middle of the night, which is nine a.m. Tessa’s time.

Jade is in a meeting, and Emma’s in class, so I tell Tessa everything.

And by telling her everything, I basically berate myself for sleeping with—and getting emotionally attached to—someone with whom I have no future.

“I didn’t sneak out,” I argue. “It was a mutual avoidance system. He stayed in his studio; I worked in the kitchen and then went to bed early.”

“Right, but even though your train wasn’t until ten, you got up at six and left.”

“I always get up at six.”

“But you didn’t have to wait around for three hours in the train station.”

I rub my forehead with one hand and sip my tea with the other. It's herbal tea, and I’m hoping to go back to sleep.

Memories of my last night with Chris flash through me: the bite of the marble counter on my hips, the sweat breaking out over my whole body, the way my pussy clenched when he saidgrab your fucking ankles.

Tessa had fanned herself when I told her that part.

As terrible as I feel, it is good to be home. The rental management company was very unhappy with me for canceling the vacation rental listing and refunding the people who had booked over the next few weeks, but I did the math, and it was cheaper than renting a place for myself. My house is impersonal, since all of our stuff is in storage, but it still feels like home.

Today, I’ll start to get my life back together. Maybe I’ll check in with my old boss at the yoga studio or some of the moms I had gotten to know in Zoe’s high school class.

But none of them will replace my best friends.

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