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I thought about the seamstress. Madis had left her place right before I found her dead. The problem was, she hadn’t stayed dead. And she also hadn’t looked like the one I’d seen here.
“And newly made Ascended are always under watch,” he continued in a tone that sounded like each word was chiseled out of stone. “However, a certain someone attempted to escape.”
Me.
He was totally talking about me.
“And those responsible for watching over the Ascended were drawn away,” he said. “Ironically, if they’d remained at their post, the Ascended wouldn’t have killed, and you still would’ve been captured. But they have been dealt with.”
I had a feeling being dealt with didn’t mean they’d simply been reprimanded. I should probably feel a little bad about that, but I couldn’t muster the energy when I still didn’t know how to process what had been done to Jove.
He wouldn’t die, but he hadn’t chosen to live as an Ascended either. It had been decided for him. Maybe he would’ve chosen to live no matter what, but he could’ve decided to die instead. I would never know. But what if he was one of those who couldn’t control his hunger? And were the Ascended good or bad? Somewhere in the middle?
My brows knitted as I thought of something. Ash could go longer than he probably should without feeding. Was it the same with these Ascended? “What…what if an Ascended chooses not to feed?”
“They will weaken over time, becoming akin to mortal once more.”
I felt a skipping motion in my chest. “So, in a way, this kind of Ascension can be undone?”
“No.” His head tilted as he frowned. “Being akin to mortal is not the same thing. If they take no blood, their bodies eventually give out. The process of that is…” His frown deepened. “Admittedly, quite disturbing.”
Clearly, it was something he’d seen before. “There have been Ascended who refused to feed?” I surmised, the ache increasing.
“There have.”
“Why?”
Deep grooves formed between his brows. “They were not grateful for the blessing bestowed upon them.”
I stared at him, somewhat dumbfounded.
He straightened, drawing his hand from the table. “What? It is clear you’re thinking something. I want to know.”
I really needed to learn how to control my facial features. “It’s just that… Well, I was thinking that maybe they weren’t grateful because they didn’t want to become something that could turn into an indiscriminate killer.”
He laughed under his breath. “All gods are capable of becoming thus, so’lis, and mortals are no different.” He sent me a long, knowing look. “And from what I know of your life this time in the mortal realm, you were no different.”
My shoulders stiffened at the truth of his words. He was right. I’d been no different.
I still wasn’t, which was kind of funny, considering the embers within me.
“Everything that is created or born has the potential to become an indiscriminate killer,” he tacked on.
I saw what he was trying to get at. “Okay.”
His eyes narrowed. “It’s not okay.”
“I said it was.”
“I may not always be able to tell when you lie, but most of the time I know,” he remarked, and I stiffened. “While I am not the Great Conspirator spoken of in the prophecy, I am a Deceiver, a teller of lies. I recognize many of yours. This is one of them.”
He was the only being who could be the Great Conspirator, and maybe he could sense my lies, but as long as he didn’t recognize the really important one…whatever. My head hurt. “All right, then,” I said, taking a breath. I could deal with a headache. “I see what you mean about everyone having the potential to be a killer, but—”
“There is no but. I am right.”
I took a deep breath. “Never mind, then.”
He stared at me, his head lowering. “No, continue.”
