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And I knew how to accomplish all of that.
My hand fell to my side as my heart kicked sharply. It wasn’t the knowledge that I might fail in an escape attempt or that I needed something to actually kill Kolis with that made me feel like vomiting. It was the fact that I knew what I had to do.
I needed to become that blank canvas. The empty vessel. No emotion. No personal needs or wants. Only skin-deep. It was the only way.
My chest clenched, and my head fell back. I stared at the gold bars above me.
Resolve sank in, entrenching itself as I opened my eyes. Slowing my breath once more, I stopped again. “I’m sorry,” I whispered to myself and Sotoria.
There was no answer.
Not from her or my annoying inner voice. I looked down where my toes peeked past the edge of the gown.
Wait.
My gaze lifted to the bed. The key. Gods, I’d nearly forgotten all about it.
Crossing the short distance, I lowered myself to the floor and peered under the bed. Relief swelled as I spied it. They hadn’t seen it yet.
I wasn’t sure how useful it would be now, but I couldn’t leave it there.
Glancing at the closed doors of the outer chamber, I went down on my belly and scooted as far as I could. I stretched out my arm, trying not to think about the dreams I’d had as a child of monsters beneath my bed. My fingers brushed the cool metal. I grabbed it and quickly rose, looking around the cage. Where could I hide it?
The chests couldn’t be that secure. Nothing in this cage was secure, except…
I thought of the one place very few men traversed.
Smirking, I hurried into the bathing area and knelt at the shelf. There were baskets on the bottom. I opened one lid, finding the feminine cloths used to protect the clothing during menstruation.
Speaking of menstruation, when was my last? Gods, I was always terrible at keeping track of them. I knew I’d had one…last month? Though I wasn’t quite sure how long I’d been here. The sky beyond the windows near the ceiling was light, but that told me nothing since I knew the sun could shine much longer in Dalos than elsewhere. I could’ve been out for a day, but based on the finally Kolis had tacked on when I woke, it could’ve been longer. So, who knew?
It didn’t matter.
It wasn’t like I was having sex with anyone that could get me pregnant. Or sex at all.
I unwound the slim bundle of cloth and slipped the key inside. Once I was sure it was hidden, I rose and caught my reflection in the mirror.
“Gods.” I winced.
Blood spotted my cheeks and forehead. The bruise on my swollen jaw was a lovely shade of purple edged in red. The split in my lower lip was raw. I could see the bruises, the imprint of fingers on my throat, even from where I stood. I looked over my shoulder at the arms of the white chair and felt sick.
It could’ve been worse, I reminded myself. Most didn’t walk away from taking a hit from a Primal. I did. It wasn’t anything to be proud of. It was just something to remember.
This had been nothing compared to the lashes Tavius had delivered. I was sure it was nothing compared to what Sotoria faced.
I thought of what Kolis had shared, and I couldn’t help but wonder if Sotoria meant something like his name did.
Our soul.
Damn. I bet his parents would be so very proud. I snorted as I stared at my reflection.
Hers would translate into my…something. That was if toria actually meant anything.
So’lis.
My soul.
A shudder went through me. Gods, he’d called her his soul? No wonder that enraged her—
