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I push off the wall and remove my cell from my pocket and dial up a number I’ve got saved but never called.
He picks up on the first ring, not knowing it’s me. “Hello?” He sounds apprehensive answering a number he doesn’t have saved in his phone. I don’t blame him. He keeps his circle very small because, to the world, who he once was no longer exists.
“You know you’re welcome here, right?” I say in greeting.
He laughs, knowing exactly who I am by the sound of my voice. “Yeah, I was supposed to be there, but I’ve been on vacation, and my flight got delayed in Chicago.”
I snort. “Should have told me. I would have sent the jet,” I say although I know he has his own. Or he did. Technically now, it’s his daughter and son-in-law’s on paper.
“Flying commercial keeps me humble,” he jokes. “Reminds me where I came from.” He laughs at his own words because we both know he never flew commercial in his life before now.
I step into an empty hospital room and walk over to the window that overlooks the courtyard. It’s so pretty. Green grass, blooming flowers of various colors. During the holidays, the bridge gets decorated with lights and garland. The wives got a hold of it and said it needed some life. Funny, considering this is where people come to die. That’ll never change.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” I ask, unable to stop myself. Not sure when I’ll get this opportunity again.
He goes silent for a second. “Would you have believed me?”
“No,” I say honestly. You wouldn’t believe some of the shit the people come up with that are brought in. They will say anything when they know they’re going to die. “But you could have tried.”
He sighs. “When your fathers were killed, so was my chance at freedom. But I never expected that to happen anyway.”
“But we took over,” I say through gritted teeth. He’s just as stubborn as his son-in-law. Our fathers were crooked as fuck. They did things that even the Lords would not have approved of.
“You guys spent months in Carnage as one of us.” He pauses. “Then after they decided you were ready, you were only focused on one thing…” He trails off, and I know exactly what he’s talking about. My wife. “So I kept a low profile and just survived.”
I run a hand down my face.
“But I can’t thank you enough. You gave me my life back. Now I’ve got a daughter, a son, and grandkids.” I can hear the smile in his voice.
“You saved my life,” I whisper.
He chuckles. “You would have survived regardless. I was just in the right place at the right time.”
I snort. Odd way of looking at it, but if you’re in Carnage, you’ve got to have a sense of humor.
“Congratulations on becoming a grandpa,” I add when the silence gets uncomfortable.
“Thank you for letting me experience it.”
We hang up, and I pocket my cell and stare out into the courtyard once again. My mind remembers the first time I ever heard his voice.
“The first wave is tolerable…the second gets colder…” He pauses before whispering, “The third is the coldest.”
It took Sin coming to us looking for Nicholas for me to realize who he was. I always thought my father was fucking Laura, and he might have, but the big secret was they were holding her husband for her. He never did anything wrong. After our fathers died, I went easy on him. Well, as much as I could because of what he did for me that night. I wish I would have set him free. Maybe it could have saved Elli from what she went through.
The door opens, and I turn to see Ashtyn enter the room with a glowing smile on her face. “A boy and a girl. Both healthy and with their momma who is doing great.”
I walk over to her, cup her face, and kiss her passionately. Tasting the saltiness in her happy tears that she’s cried witnessing both Laura and Elli give birth. They both had scheduled C-sections. Gavin performed one while Devin did the other.
I pull away, and her heavy eyes open as she breathes deeply. “How are my babies?” I ask, dropping my hand to her growing belly.
“Great,” she whispers.
“Have you felt okay today?”
She rolls her eyes. “Yes, Saint.” Laughing softly, she adds, “We’ve been good for weeks.”
Her first couple of weeks were rough, but I still worry about her. That’ll never change. I understand what Nicholas was saying because I feel the same way—I don’t deserve the life I have. I get to lie in bed with my wife at night, holding her, loving her, and talking about our future while during the day, I’m covered in another man or woman’s blood, making them pay for their betrayal. I’m not sure what I did to deserve the life I have, but I’ll do anything to keep it.
