Page 59 of Carnage


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Fuck!He just saw me parked in the driveway. I didn’t pull it into the garage. Who the hell is this that they know what I drive?

“She must have come home earlier,” my mother adds. “It’s fine. I’m sure she’s asleep.”

“Go check,” he commands.

My pulse races.

“I’m not—”

“Go fucking check,” he snaps, interrupting her.

I twist the doorknob as softly as I can. I rush to my bed as I rip the shirt up and over my head, throw my bag across the room, and kick off my shoes. I yank my duvet back and jump into bed, pulling it up to my neck, my back facing the door, and bring it up over my face so only half of my head can be seen.

My door opens, and I hold my breath as light filters into my room.

“See, I told you,” my mother whispers, and my heart hammers, knowing a man I don’t know is looking into my room.

The door softly closes a moment later, and I let out the breath I was holding but don’t dare move. Instead, I lie in the dark staring at nothing, trying to figure out what the fuck is going on and who is actually on my side.

I feel like I can’t trust anyone anymore.

SAINT

It’s beenthree days since Ashtyn ran out of Carnage, and I took her home. She’s avoiding me. I’ve called, texted, and left voicemails, but they’ve all gone unanswered.

I’m not sure what to do at this point. How much time does she need to come to terms with this life? She grew up around this. The woman who she saw wasn’t innocent, but she didn’t give me the chance to explain that. It’s not like we choose random women in the mall parking lot and kidnap them before torturing them. I hate to say it, but there is a method to the madness.

I’ve been watching her on camera. She’s staying at her parents’, secluding herself from the world. She mainly drinks and stays in bed, sleeping quite a bit. She’s going to classes, but not all of them. She’ll leave for an hour or two and then come home and crawl back in bed. It makes me mad that she’s being this way. That she’s so shaken up over a bitch who doesn’t deserve it. And the way she looked at me. Pulled away from me. Does she really think I’d hurt her? I’ve saved her. Of course I can’t tell her that. There’s no scenario where I’d come out as the good guy.

“Saint?” my father calls out.

“Yeah?” I walk toward him in the basement at Carnage.

“The woman isn’t pregnant.” He shoves some papers into my chest, and I reach up to take them so they don’t fall to my feet. “Take her to see Devin. He’s expecting her.” With that, he continues down the hallway.

I make my way to the woman’s room that she was placed in the night her husband brought her in. Unlocking the steel door, it creaks, letting her know she has a visitor. She lies on a black operating table that has wheels. Usually, you don’t get anything to lay on when sentenced to a cell, but her husband wants her strapped down at all times.

A white and brown medical restraint runs across the bottom of the table with her ankles buckled into them on each end. Another runs from side to side on her upper legs, strapping her thighs down, which force her legs wide open. She has a catheter that hangs on the side. The third and final strap runs underneath her neck, also fastened on her throat to keep her head down. The ball gag has been removed and replaced with bondage tape now over her lips and chin. I’m not sure who removed the gag, but they replaced something inside of her mouth by the way her cheeks expand.

When her wild eyes see me, she begins to scream into her gag and thrash around. She’s still got energy. It’ll take a few more days to lose hope. For her to understand that this will be her life now.

I drop the papers onto the straitjacket that she’s still strapped in and unlock the wheels. Then I begin to push her out of the room and down the hall.

The woman continues her worthless fight. She’s just wearing herself out. But it won’t matter. Devin is going to knock her out and perform a hysterectomy. I must say I’m relieved that she’s not pregnant. I don’t want to have to explain that to Ashtyn if she were to ask me. I think she plans on never talking to me again, but that’s not how it’s going to work. She’s just lucky right now that Carnage has kept me busy and away from her.

When I get the first chance, I’m going to her parents’ house and making sure she remembers who she is—mine. And that I’m not playing this silent game anymore. She can hate me all she wants; it’s not going to keep me away.

I enter the double doors of the hospital, and Devin waits for me. He is our main doctor here at Carnage. Has been since I was little.

I bring the table to a stop, and he takes over. I watch him push her into a room as her muffled cries and screams fade to nothing when the doors close behind them.

She’s a mother…was a mother. She traded her only child in for a life that she thought was better than this. Her husband was informed that his daughter was found dead of an overdose in an alley last week. She had never done drugs a day in her life. So he said. He had went through his wife’s cell and their banking accounts to find where she had set it up to have their daughter killed. Paid five grand to an old boyfriend of the daughter’s to make it look like a suicide. He had messaged his ex that he missed her and talked her into going out on a date with him. After they finished dinner, they went to a friends of his house where they shot her up with drugs and raped her before tossing her into an alley once done.

I knew of their daughter. She would be a senior at Barrington next year, and her mother didn’t want her living the life that her husband had planned for their daughter.

I grew up in this life around death and torture every day, so I’m desensitized by all of it. But this one gets to me because that could have been Ashtyn. Her mother has been so hell-bent on her not being my chosen that I know just how far she went to keep that from happening. I was lucky that Altus shared what he knew with me.

Now we’ve each got a secret. And that’s what bothers me the most. My hands are tied, and I can’t do shit about it. Not now anyway and maybe never. It’s eating at me, and I hate to let shit go.

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