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Oli swallows roughly and huffs a laugh. “It’s something I came up with after watching my mom struggle for so long.” My heart sinks and I let silence fill the car once more as she works through her thoughts. “I don’t remember much from when I was little, mostly the good days. But when we got older, they happened so rarely. When her days were good, they were really good, and when they were bad…”
She breaks off, the fingers of her free hand digging into her leggings. I don’t need her to finish the sentence, not really. I know how bad they got toward the end. I was there for that, at least somewhat. But back then, she and Chase did a lot to hide it from us.
“Anyway,” she murmurs. “I watched her disintegrate before my eyes and I swore I’d never be the same. Even when I was little, I knew I didn’t want to be like her. She was always just so fucking sad.” With a shrug, she bites her lower lip. “I vowed to always be happy, even when I didn’t want to be.” Her eyes find mine and though they’re glossy, there’s a lightness to them now.
“You’re manifesting your own happiness,” I surmise, and she bobs her head. “It’s brilliant.”
She blinks rapidly. “I know.”
I chuckle. “But why delusional?”
“Because I’m delusionally optimistic about my life, Evie, and I won’t settle for anything less. People spend their time manifesting money and fancy cars and big houses and while I get that, I really do, I don’t want all that. I just want to exist freely as myself without nature or DNA dictating what I have to be or where I’ll end up. I create my own future and it all starts right here.” She taps her head and smiles at me.
I can’t help but smile along with her, her words so similar to everything I’d just been thinking about.
“You make it sound so easy,” I murmur.
Oli shakes her head. “It’s really not, and I’m not saying it works one hundred percent of the time, but any happiness is better than none, right?” I open my mouth to say something, but she quickly pokes my chin and snaps it shut again. “No more talking. We’re wasting time.”
Without another word, she climbs from the car and tugs her silver backpack from behind her seat. Oli’s door slams shut, but I still can’t move.
I watch her adjust her denim ball cap that says Dead Inside, her thin blonde ponytail poking through the back. She bends down and hikes her baby pink knee-high socks up and over her lavender leggings before zipping up a matching hoodie. I’m still watching as she glares at me, huffs, and stomps over to my door before ripping it open.
“Out, sugarplum. We’ve got demons to fuck.”
My eyes narrow, but I let her pull me from the car. She fiddles with my outfit, making adjustments here and there that are completely unnecessary. When she’s done, she snags a matching backpack from the backseat and thrusts it into my arms.
“What are we doing? Where are we?” I ask the questions even as I thread my arms through the straps and follow her like a willing sheep being led to my eventual slaughter.
“You’ll see it when we get there.” She waggles her brows at my grumble. “Everyone loves to be edged, Evie. Get with the program.”
We’re standing on a cliff’s edge that’s suspended hundreds of feet in the air overlooking what feels like all of Georgia, and it took hours to hike here.
Through a forest that more times than not, I thought might swallow us whole and never spit us back out. It was hot, sticky, creepy and filled with bugs.
It was also one of the most magical things I’d ever seen.
Until now.
I suck in a gasp as I slowly step forward, taking in the incredible view. My heart drops when I see exactly how high we are from the ground below. Surprisingly, it’s not fear that consumes me, it’s something else entirely.
I feel the same as I do when I cam.
Exhilarated.
Powerful.
Free.
My eyes flutter closed as I take a deep breath, inhaling the thick, humid air. The breeze picks up, brushing my loose waves across my face. It’s nearly silent, nothing but the sound of birds and leaves rustling to remind me of where I am.
With every breath, my mind clears a little more, leaving behind everything that’s been plaguing me.
Isaac. Roman. Mama.
Divinity.
Marcus.
