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“Absolutely, I did,” he tells me in that thick, rich tone, his body tensing beneath my hands. “When I first saw you, I knew immediately that you would be my next victim. I dropped everything I was doing and followed you. I had to know everything about you, and over the next few weeks, I learned everything there was to know about Kyah Bailey. The more I learned and the closer I got, the hungrier I became. I had it all planned out so perfectly. You were going to be my most thrilling kill yet.”
“When did it change?” I whisper, my heart pounding a million miles an hour.
“I’m not entirely sure,” he muses, deep in thought. “Perhaps it was after I met you in the hallway and you raced me down to the laundry room. I knew then that there was something more to you, and I needed to explore it, but I suppose things really shifted after I realized just how much you got off on the fear. You excite me, Kyah. No woman has ever done that before. The ones I’ve killed in the past have been a means to an end, an object to use in order to get off. Taking their lives was a rush, but I don’t need the rush of murder with you, not anymore. I get that rush just by seeing your face in the morning, and when I slide inside of you, it’s better than any kill I’ve ever had.”
My gaze lifts to his, and I stop what I’m doing, my hand hovering just an inch above his chest. “I don’t know what to make of that,” I tell him honestly. “There’s a part of you that terrifies me. Knowing exactly what you’re capable of and having to spend my days hoping that you won’t change your mind. But then there’s this other part that is terrified of not seeing where this goes. I should be trying to run from you.”
Alex nods. “Yes, you should,” he agrees. “But it would really fucking gut me if you did.”
“I think you gave me everything I didn’t know I needed. Everything I didn’t know I even wanted,” I admit. “The man I met as my neighbor makes my heart race in the best ways, and I so easily fell in love with him. You’re charming and smart, and you have this insane ability to make me smile in a way no other man has. Not to mention, that dominating side of you got me so worked up. But then there’s the man who snuck into my apartment. And yes, at first, I was terrified. I didn’t know what your intentions were, and I was scared you wanted to hurt me, but then you started to touch me, and I’d never felt so alive. And suddenly, I found myself looking forward to your visits. You give me the closeness that I need and the insanity that I crave. Despite the whole serial killer thing, you’re kinda the perfect man.”
Alex reaches out, his fingers gently gripping my chin and holding my stare. “Only perfect for you.”
My cheeks flush, and not knowing where to go from here, I drop my attention back to his chest, still having two very big burning questions raging inside my head. “Don’t hold back, Mace,” he says. “If there’s something you need to know. Ask me.”
I swallow hard, and my eyes well with tears, I hastily try to blink them away, but one traitorous little tear falls and rolls down my cheek. I lift my chin and watch as he zeros in on the tear sliding down my face. “Kyah—”
“No, I’m fine,” I say, cutting off whatever he was about to say. “I just . . . Crew and Viper. Tell me you didn’t do it.”
Alex holds my stare, just like he had when telling me he’d killed his mom, and I know the answer before he opens his mouth. “They needed to go, Kyah,” he tells me, watching me closely, clearly choosing his words carefully. “Crew was no good for you. I was here when he hit you. I saw the way the force of his fist threw you across the room. There wasn’t even a shred of real guilt in his eyes.”
“So that means he deserved the death penalty?”
“No,” he says so calmly. “The deal he made with his brother did though. I wasn’t about to let that happen.”
“That’s why you killed Mason too?”
“Yes. He was closing in on you. I had hoped after Crew died, he would forgive his brother’s debt. However, when he showed up here, he made it clear that it was still his intention to claim you. Besides, considering what he did for a living, did I really need an excuse to end his life? He was a bastard who kidnapped vulnerable women off the street and sold them to be raped and enslaved.”
I nod, not able to disagree one bit. “And Viper?” I ask, my hands shaking as another tear falls.
“Viper was becoming an issue,” he says bluntly. “Just like Crew, I don’t believe you fully grasp what kind of man he was. He didn’t have your best interests at heart, and even after only knowing you a few months, I watched as he became more possessive every day. It was only a matter of time before he took you away, just like Mason wanted. Only instead of selling you to the highest bidder, he wanted to keep you for himself.”
I swallow hard, my mouth suddenly dry because deep down, I think I know he’s right. Did he deserve to die for it? I really don’t know.
“Are you okay?” he asks, hesitantly reaching out for me again, and when I don’t flinch away, he drops his hand back to my thigh, gently squeezing.
“You killed them to protect me?” Alex nods, and I let out a heavy breath, choosing to be okay with it. “I don’t want you killing people for my sake. That can’t happen again.”
“I can’t promise you that,” he tells me. “I can’t just turn it off. This need to kill is ingrained in who I am, and I can’t guarantee that I won’t kill again if somebody threatens you. I’m going to want to protect you the only way I know how, but I can promise that I will try.”
I nod, realizing this is probably the best I’m going to get. “I don’t know how this is supposed to work between you and me.”
“Trust me, baby,” he says, that cocky grin I love spreading across his face. “Neither do I, but isn’t it going to be fun working it out?”
41
KYAH
AfterputtingNatinher Uber twenty minutes ago, I stand in my apartment with a hollowness in my chest. I haven’t seen Alex all day, and in the grand scheme of things, that isn’t very long, but I’ve gotten used to his constant presence in my life—whether it be innocent or downright fucked up.
Usually, when I get home from work or I’m just getting up in the morning, I can look out into the hallway and find him waiting for me, but tonight is different.
I war with myself for another twenty minutes, wondering if I should just go over there and knock on the door, but after pulling all the skeletons out of his closet last night, maybe he’s feeling differently about me now . . . Or maybe I’m just overthinking it.
Shit. He’s told me everything I could ever need to destroy his life, and a man simply doesn’t do that for a woman he doesn’t intend to keep forever. I need to find my lady-balls and just knock on his damn door. Hell, maybe he’ll chain me to another bed, maybe even hang me from chains like he threatened he would.
I go to make my move when the sound of an incoming call cuts through the mental battle plaguing my head, and as I glance down at my phone on the armrest of my couch, a wide smile cuts across my face.
