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Savannah is quiet for a moment, only this time, she doesn’t stall. She’s thinking. Eventually, though, she quietly asks, “How long were you two sleeping together, Elsie?”
I grip my mug a little tighter. “What makes you ask such a silly—"
“You said that thing about meaning nothing to him with way too much emotion for it not to mean more than that. Spill it.”
“Sometimes, I hate that you know me so well.”
She shrugs meekly. “Now you’re the one who’s stalling.”
“The first time happened right during my first real presentation with him.”
“The day I was there? I knew it! Your shirt—"
I laugh. “No. That was a genuine wardrobe malfunction. It was shortly after that.”
“Was it serious?”
“We tried that thing where you lie about your plans going into it and say, ‘it’s just sex’ and—"
“Friends— or I guesscoworkers— with benefits?”
I nod. “It was stupid. We should have never done that.”
“But you don’t sound like you actually regret it.”
Sighing, I admit, “I don’t. Not really. I just wish things had ended differently.”
“Or not at all?”
“I don’t know about that. But we had a connection. Or, I thought we did. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I just saw what I wanted to see.” But that didn’t feel true at all. “I don’t know, Savannah. Things had been going really well. He even took me back to his place, which is a rarity for him, I think. Beau made me feel like the second most important thing in his life, and—"
“You deserve more than that.”
I laugh. “I didn’t mean that as a bad thing. The resort has eaten up a lot of his life, and I’m the same with my career, so I don’t hold that against him at all. But then everything with Dad went to hell, and he dropped the resort to help me… I don’t know what to think about any of it.”
When Beau calls again, though, Savannah sees his name on the caller ID and looks up at me.
I turn the phone over on the console table. “It’s girl time. Not Beau time.” Never again.
-
33
ELSIE
No matter where I’m at in my head, a walk through Central Park does me good. It’s early evening, and I’ve just left the site of my soon-to-be-built Apple Store, and I am on cloud nine. Everything is coming together the way it should. No arguments over the smallest details. No fighting about windows. The past two weeks have been wonderful.
There hasn’t been any office sex, either, but that’s just fine by me.
Sure, the sex with Beau was the best I’ve ever had. I’ll miss it. But that’s all. I definitely don’t miss the arguments over nothing. Or the way he used to make that face when he was thinking about his argument. That sexy smirk of his got on my nerves.
But enough of that. Beau MacMillan’s bullshit is neither here nor there. I am free of him and the work of that gigantic project. Apple has been good to me, too, keeping things flexible for when I fly down to West Virginia to see Mom and Dad. This is exactly what I need. Just like this walk to clear my head.
I’ve spent more time in Central Park lately, going for walks here every day this week after work. Light plays in the leaves as they blow in the warm breeze. The angles and shadows spark something in my brain.
Something that would be perfect for Beau’s resort.
I shake my head and bank the idea for a future project. Silly that he’s still on my mind. But I can’t deny the pain in my chest when I think of him. Without Savannah around, I don’t have to be brave for anyone but me, and I know it’s an act. The situation hurts. But it’s over, and it’s time to move on. Move forward. A deep breath settles me back down. The walk home will help—"
