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I’ve thought I’ve been going crazy for months now…
“Four cycles,” Sammael admits.
Cycles?
“Months,” he amends. “Humans refer to them as months.”
“Fourmonths? And you only just decided to tell me this?”
“Oh, Hope… you only just started to call me to you.”
CHAPTER9
VERUS AMOR
HOPE
Iwas so worried that I would wake up the next morning and still feel like garbage.
To my surprise, I don’t. I actually feel more relaxed than I have in ages, and if I didn’t have a vivid recollection of the disappointment flashing across Jake’s face as I all but booted him out my front door, I’d second guess if I got lucky last night.
I know I didn’t bother pulling out my vibe, either. As shitty as I felt all day and night, I remember passing out, hoping that fourteen hours of sleep was just what I needed to shake it off.
Looks like I was right. Stretching my arms, snuggling back into my pillow, I decide it had to be some weird twenty-four hour bug.
I mean, what’s the alternative? That my vivid sex dream from last night, when I conjured the monster of my fantasies and ended up riding his face to an explosive orgasm, was actually real? That the mate sickness I imagined was making me so hot and horny that, if he whipped out his dick, I might have decided to ride that next?
Despite how it seems like it was at the time, it was just a dream. Unconscious Hope was attracted to the horned demon with the purple eyes for two reasons: one) because it’s closing in on Halloween and this is the season to let my monsterfucker, freak flag fly and two) because I came up with him, putting him in the starring role of my fantasies, so why wouldn’t I want to fuck him?
I’ve never really had a type. Now, I won’t say I’m not shallow and that looks don’t play a part. They do. There has to be something about a guy that turns me on otherwise why would I waste my time, right? But I can be drawn to a lanky, nerdy librarian one moment, then be ready to be naked with a seven-foot-tall demon with horns and muscles so hard, I could take a bite out of them the next. Jake and my imaginary demon are as different as night and day when it comes to appearance, but personality…
I’m a big personality gal. To me, that trumps everything else. I like thoughtful. I like sweet. I like earnest… basically, give me your golden retriever-types and your cinnamon rolls, and I’m basically done for.
Jake’s persistence never really bothered me because I knew that, at the end of the day, he always respected my ‘no’. When I was firm about it, he backed off, but then he’d send me a video because he said it made him think of me, or off-handedly quote Whiskey Rose lyrics at me… and, whoops. I started to wonder ‘what-if’ again.
My monster, though… I remember how, in my dream, I told him that I wished he was ‘real’. As I reach over, grabbing my phone and checking the time, sighing in relief when I see that I still have ten minutes before I have to be in the shower to get ready for week, I have to admit that I still kinda do.
What kind of woman doesn’t want an otherworldly demon who looks at her as though she hung the freaking moon before just about begging to eat her out? And the way he was still so sweet, getting the idea that a ‘kiss’ was an acorn from one of my favorite movies?
That’s another reason why I know that I created him out of my subconsciousness. A gentle giant who is charmed enough by Peter Pan to think it’s real? Who then tries to show his affection for me by leaving acorns on my porch because he’s a ‘ghost’ who can’t reach me any other way but my dreams?
Yeah, right.
I just took the squirrels’ tendency to leave acorns in my way and turned it into something sweet, that’s all.
Still, can’t deny that that was a pretty spicy dream I had. Whether it was an aftereffect from my strange bug that had me horny as hell, I’m not sure, but at least I’m not sick anymore.
I’ll take what I can get.
* * *
I’m stillin a great mood after I drag my butt out of bed and take a quick shower so that I can get ready for work. That done, I’m thinking about whether I should splurge and get a bagel and a cup of tea at Dunkin’ or if I should brew some of my own at home.
Green tea does wonders for me. I switch to coffee when I need the caffeine boost, but I prefer green tea—and sometimes black tea—as a pick-me-up to start my day.
Checking my phone, I see that there’s enough time to eat at my house. I probably should. Eating out with Jake last night wasn’t part of my budget, and I’d be better off saving the couple of bucks I’d spend on breakfast for another day.
However, as I jog down my stairs, about to head though my living room so that I can get to my kitchen, I stop short when I notice that there is something resting on the top of my couch.
