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He might be a Guardian,Frey reminded me coolly,but you’re the Great Guardian. You should be informed. They have no business keeping anything from you. Get your act together and find out what they’re talking about.
I hesitated for a moment, then reluctantly I went to the study door and, feeling like an idiot, I put my head against it, listening as hard as I could. The door was solid oak, though, and it seemed Emrick and Hector were talking quietly. I could barely make out a word.
I sighed. ‘It’s no use,’ I whispered to Frey. ‘I might as well go upstairs.’
He actually hissed at me!You’re the Great Guardian! Start acting like it!
I stared at him for a moment, wondering if he’d lost the plot. Then, as I looked into his eyes which were filled with fire and determination, I realised he was right. If they wanted me to be their saviour, their mighty leader, they needed to start treating me that way. I needed to start treating me that way.
I pushed open the study door without even knocking, and even though I was nervous I entered the room with my head held high.
They both turned to me, clearly taken aback by my unexpected arrival.
‘Lowen,’ Emrick said, giving me an uncertain smile, ‘what can we do for you? We were just in the middle of something but—’
‘That’s why I’m here,’ I said. ‘I want to know what you’re talking about.’
They shifted uncomfortably and Hector said, ‘It’s private, Lowen.’
‘Why don’t you find something to do, and I’ll come and find you when we’re finished here,’ Emrick said kindly.
‘No!’ As they stared at me in astonishment I ploughed on before I could change my mind. ‘You expect me to be Wulfram Pendragon, the Great Guardian, the man who’s going to bring peace to the magical world, yet you’re still treating me like Lowen Ericson, the solicitor from Gerrenporth.’
They exchanged surprised looks.
‘You’re not Wulfram yet,’ Emrick reminded me gently. ‘And until then—’
‘I’m aware of that,’ I said coolly, ‘but that doesn’t mean you can treat me as if I’m insignificant. Whoever Wulfram is, whatever he becomes, a large part of him will be Lowen, and his actions will, in no small part, be framed by what he’s learned and absorbed before he claims the sword. I’m sick of being left in the dark. If you want me to step up then it’s time you started treating me with some respect.’
‘Lowen,’ Hector said gently, ‘believe me, we have every respect for you. We’re just trying to protect you for now.’
‘What good is protecting me going to do?’ I demanded. ‘Have you any idea how terrified I am? Do you know that I can’t sleep at night for worrying about letting everyone down? Imagining the worst over and over. Fearing that the people I love will be killed, and the world plunged into a magical war, all because I didn’t know what to do? My failure will be everyone’s failure. I need to start learning. It’s no good leaving me on the sidelines because I haven’t taken Wulfram’s mantle yet. I need to be included now!’
Thankfully they didn’t tell me to stop being a diva and demand that I leave the room. I had nothing left, so if they had I’d have probably slunk away and gone to my bedroom, feeling even worse than I did right now.
As it was, Emrick nodded. ‘He’s right. We’ve been a bit foolish here. We can’t just expect him to carry on as normal and then suddenly transform when he finds the sword. He should be part of all our decisions and plans.’
‘Fair enough,’ Hector said. He smiled at me. ‘But if you think you’ll miraculously know all the answers you can think again. Right now, Emrick and I are having a rather heated debate about the future of Blaise St Clair. Sit down, Lowen. Perhaps you can tell us your opinion on this subject.’
I really hadn’t expected them to listen to me, so this was a bit of a shock. I could hardly back out now, though, after my great speech. Sinking into an armchair, I noticed Frey lying by Hector’s chair. He gave me an encouraging look. I swallowed.
‘Very well,’ I said, with as much dignity as I could muster. ‘Let me hear your thoughts on the matter.’
I was sure I saw Emrick’s lips twitch in amusement, but I ignored him. This was serious stuff. Time to start earning my stripes.
‘As you know,’ Hector said, ‘Blaise became my responsibility when he turned up in Castle Clair, having travelled from 1669 to the present day. Once we discovered what he was up to and, thankfully, stopped him, I had a decision to make about his future. Blaise,’ he said with a rueful smile, ‘believed he would be executed. I should imagine it came as quite a relief when he discovered Guardians don’t do that sort of thing. Even so, he was a problem.’
‘Why didn’t you send him back to his own time?’ I asked curiously. ‘Surely that would have solved the problem?’
‘Far from it. You see, the timeline had closed around Blaise’s disappearance. It was an established historical fact that he never returned to 1669. A whole legend had sprung up around his apparent death. Plus, Jennet and Mary Clipson would have been in danger from him. Even without his magic he had the intelligence and cunning to make them pay somehow. And then, of course, there was the possibility that he’d marry and have children, which would mean Bevil’s descendants were no longer the St Clairs in charge of Castle Clair. They might not even exist. The possible repercussions were far too great to risk.’
‘Of course.’ I felt stupid and naïve. Listening to Hector it was obvious that Blaise couldn’t go back to his own time. What a ridiculous question!
‘I had two options,’ Hector continued. ‘I could let Blaise hold onto his memories but keep him prisoner for the rest of his life, or I could remove his memories, give him a whole new identity, and let him live a fulfilling life as someone else. The latter seemed kinder, and Celeste certainly preferred it. Despite how afraid and angry she seems right now, she has a kind heart, and couldn’t bear the thought of him wasting all that potential. I therefore removed all traces of Blaise and gave him the identity of John Ford, with new memories of a life he’d never really lived, and a friend he’d never really known. Simon. His new Guardian.’
‘If Simon was his Guardian,’ I said slowly, ‘how come he let him get involved with Romy?’
Hector sighed. ‘It should never have happened. Simon stayed with him for a year, guiding him into finding a job that would help him think about other people for a change. He got him a home, which “John” believed he’d lived in for years, and generally smoothed the path for him into his new life. When John was settled and happy, Simon eased off and took on another charge. He kept popping back without John knowing to make sure he was all right, of course, but there was no cause for alarm. His visits became less frequent, and it seemed his work was done.’
