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The Shark House is fun, and comes free of charge—which I appreciate as my father likes to keep tabs on everything he spends on all of us to make us dance to his tune—but I would likely prefer a house like this one, too. After I get access to my trust fund next year, I might just purchase one.
"You and your cousin'swife?" Damian whispers, so shocked he's likely looking for pearls to clutch.
He’s been around for so long, I tend to forget he's not a legacy. He wasn't raised like the rest of us. To him, vaginas become sacred, not to be touched by anyone but their husbands, the moment the chick says her vows, or whatever. Thankfully, the Rothfords, the Vosses, the Greenes, and us Goltzes live by different rules, so I know what Vi looks like with a cock in each hole.
Beautiful. That's what she looks like.
"I mean, Rhys isn't really my cousin," Rom says, like that could be the part Damian finds concerning. "Camden's my maternal first cousin, and his paternal first cousin. The two of us aren't actually related."
Damian wisely opts to not press the matter further. He's just so fucking vanilla, his brain would explode if we tried teaching him our version of the birds and the bees.
"Hey, what can you tell me about the Andrews girl?" I ask lightly.
Roman snorts. "Oh hell no, man. You're so not going there."
Why the fuck is everyone telling me what to do in relation to that woman? And don't they realize it makes me want to do the exact opposite?
"What? I'm just asking," I say, with a shrug for good measure.
Roman sighs and takes several moments before speaking again. "She spent her entire life in the foster care system. Stayed in the same house for the last five years, before moving out when she turned eighteen. She volunteered at a shelter and stayed in a room at the owner's. Enrolled in college online. She's a straight A kinda girl."
That's a lot of words to tell me nothing at all. I want to know why she's jumpy. I want to know who made her fear her shadow, and mine.
I suppose I'll have to go to the source and ask.
4
SARAH
I'm a little ashamed of myself as I replay the events of the pool party earlier, when I hike up in the hills. I ran. There's no other way of saying it. I ran away, and implied Marius's completely, refreshingly normal treatment of me had been problematic.
It wasn't. I…liked being thrown in the pool. It made my heart beat hard in a completely different way than my usual anxiety-ridden palpitations.
I just wanted out of the limelight, so I saw an excuse and leapt at it.It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last. I let my anxiety rule my life. I know I do. I just don’t know how to make myself stop after all this time. My brain, my body, just refuses to understand that I’m safe. Away from Barlett. Away from…him.
Violet seemed seriously upset with Marius. I'll have to talk to her and admit I actually had wanted to leave the party before he ever touched me. Then she'll be offended, or sad, for a different reason. She'll ask what was wrong with the party, when the only actual problem is me.
Ugh. Peopling is hard.
To immerse myself back in my world for a little longer, I blast the volume of my headphones higher than I should, letting the unique, suave, deliciously smooth baritone fill my entire soul.
I have the biggest crush on this vlogger, an anonymous guy who goes by the name Specter, and pushes the cliche a bit further by wearing a white mask, completely covering the upper part of his face and some of the right side.
But he looks hot. He definitelysoundshot.
And more to the point, he’s not a real, flesh and blood person to me—just pixels behind a screen. He’s a safe entity to drool over. A vlogger I’ve never met isn’t likely to burst out of the screen and beat me to a pulp like real men could.
Would.
Although today’s a gorgeous, warm sunny day, and the hills of Thorn Falls are a sight to behold, I bring my screen up to my eyes and watch the video again, rather than just listening.
Specter films most of his videos half naked, with that drool-worthy six-pack on display. He covers songs, with his deep, dirty, panty-melting voice. He's been live for years, religiously posting every week, and growing a huge audience. I found him right when he started, and I've watched them all more times than I could or would want to count, on loop in my darkest hours.
His new videos are like a fresh dose of crack to an addict. It's unhealthy, the way I look forward to his latest posts, every day on Sunday, lunch time. I rarely have much fun at parties, but I was impatient to get home because ofhimmore than anything doing with Violet's party.
I really do owe her an apology.
And Marius.
