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His hand cups the back of my neck, his fingers cold. “And you have done very well, my Vivi. I knew you were strong.”
He says the words like a caress, and I should probably shake his hand off so he doesn’t get any ideas, but I’m tired and in pain and for some reason, I actually appreciate the reassurance. A broken finger won’t stop me. I can handle everything. I can.
So I push him away, gently. “Why did you follow me, Skarr?”
He tilts his head, and it’s clear he’s puzzled at my question. I can’t help but notice how un-lizard-like his features are compared to the opponent of the story he was telling me. He has no snout full of jagged teeth, for starters. His features are strong and broad like the other aliens, but still vaguely human. The most alien thing about his face is perhaps the color, or the line of ridged scales that goes across his brow and down his nose. Out of the men dropped here—well, other than Jason—he’s truly the most human-looking, especially with his soft, wavy hair.
“Why did I follow you? Because you are my mate, of course. I was worried I had offended you in some way.” Skarr seems frustrated at the thought. “I do not know what I did wrong.”
My hand throbs dully, and I remind myself that he coached me through wrapping it. That he’s here, supporting me instead of crowing about how amazing he is over by the fire. I need to be understanding. “I don’t like it when you keep calling attention to me,” I tell him. “It makes me upset.”
He tilts his head, and for a moment, he looks very reptilian. “Why?”
“Because I’m not any of those things you say!”
He blinks. “Yes, you are.”
“No, I’m not. I don’t know where you’re getting all this nonsense. You barely know me.”
That smug smile curves his mouth. “Yes, and in the time I have gotten to know you, I have seen you keep calm when others wept. I have seen you work to collect fuel and ensure the fire was warm and blazing for the others. You have pushed me away despite resonance because I have not yet impressed you enough. And just now you have broken a finger and set it again. I see all these things and they tell me you are strong and capable and clever. Where is the lie?”
My mouth falls open. A wordless protest escapes me. He sees all that and thinks it’s strength? To me, it’s just panic. Sheer, undiluted panic. “I don’t know who I am, Skarr—”
“You are Vivi,” he says, as if it’s the simplest thing in the world.
“But I’m not. That’s just a name that was given to me because I don’t really know who I am. I don’t have enough memories.”
“Then I will help you figure out who you are.” He grins again, showing sharp canines. “It is my duty as your mate. I will help you discover the truth of who you are and point out all your merits so you see them.”
Oh boy. “Can we tone it down on the whole merits thing? I really find it embarrassing.”
“There is no shame in being strong and competent.”
He really doesn’t get it. I try a different tactic. “Okay, but if you tell them all of my strengths, then I have no secret skills to go into battle with. Remember how you were surprised by the poison spitter? It makes sense to keep some secrets hidden, so we have an advantage.”
It’s the right thing to say. Skarr’s eyes light up with delight. “You are sowise.”
“Thanks. I try.” I wiggle my hand a little and bite my lip at the surge of pain. “Fuck, this sucks ass.”
He blinks, eyes going wide, and regards my hand. “It…what?”
Oh. Oh, he won’t understand the human phrasing of that, will he? My face gets instantly hot. “I mean that this is unfortunate.”
“Sucking ass is unfortunate? Such a thing is not welcomed?”
Oh my god, he’s not going to let this go. “I mean…it’s just a saying. My hand getting hurt is unfortunate. It doesn’t have anything to do with actual ass-sucking.”
“So you would still enjoy an ass-suck?” He looks deadly earnest.
“I-I don’t think I’m going to answer that.”
A smug, knowing look crosses his face. “That is all I need to know.”
Something tells me that he’s assuming that my lack of response means that I do, actually, want an ass-eating. To be honest, I don’t know if I do or don’t, but I do know I’m not giving him any more ammo. With my luck he’d bring it up at dinner tomorrow around the fire and launch into how perfectly he’s going to eat my ass. Just thinking about that scenario makes me whimper.
Skarr touches my shoulder again. “As for your hand, it is indeed unfortunate, but we will hide it from the others. We will not tell them of your accident.” He thinks for a moment and then pulls off his outer layer of furs, offering it to me. “Carry this over your hands to mask them, like you did for me.”
I take it, surprised that he’d offer his wraps so quickly, because he needs them to protect himself from the cold. “Why would we not tell anyone I hurt myself?”
