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“Honey, we’re not upset with you. We’re just—” Mom glanced at Dad, who only scowled. “—we’re worried. You spent so long depressed because of Zak. Are you sure you’re ready to date again?”
Dad waved everything she’d said away and asked his own question: “Are you sure you want to date someone who’s a decade older than you? Charlie, he’s old. I guess it’s better than dating someone our age, but not by much. Aren’t there any boys at school you’d rather date, for your poor father’s sanity?” He apparently could not get past the age thing.
I stood before them knowing what I had to tell them. “Yes, Mom, I’m ready to date. I like Ian a lot. And there’s no one else at school. Everyone my age is into partying and posting everything about their life online, and I’m just not like that. Ian isn’t, either. I’m happy, and I feel good with him. Isn’t that all that matters?”
My parents exchanged a look, and it was my mom who got up and came over to me. “Of course, honey. We’re just looking out for you, that’s all.” She leaned in and gave me a kiss on the forehead.
I headed upstairs, mostly to end the conversation about Brett and the fact that he was ten years older than me. As far as my parents knew, we’d met when he’d come to campus to take a business class his job had paid for. They didn’t know who he really was, and they didn’t know he was actually twelve years older than me, not ten.Those extra two years might just give my dad an aneurism.
Once I was in my room, I leaned my back against my door and closed my eyes.
That wasn’t how I thought today would go at all. Brett was supposed to watch the house, see if he found anyone stalking around, not barge in and pretend to be my boyfriend. Now… now I had to continue the charade, even when he wasn’t around. Now my parents would ask questions about him every day, and I’d have to pull everything from my ass since I couldn’t exactly tell them the truth. Brett made everything ten times more complicated than it already was.
And what’s worse, I think I was starting to have real feelings for him—which was a bad idea all around.
The night wore on. I got dressed for bed once darkness fell outside, and all the while I waited for a restricted call. That, and struggled with my possible crush on a serial killer.
But there was no call, and by the time I lay in bed, the only thing I’d succeeded in wrestling with was the idea that I liked kissing Brett Banks. And if I liked kissing him, odds were I’d like other things, too, things I hadn’t done—or enjoyed—in a long time, if not ever.
I heard my parents go to bed around ten, and then the house was silent. I tossed and I turned, unable to drift off. For once, it wasn’t because of my stalker and the whole ‘unknown’ thing. No, this time, it was purely because of Brett and that stupid mouth of his.
You know all those old wives’ tales about falling asleep? Yeah, they’re loads of crap. I tried counting sheep, counting backwards from one hundred, even tried to lay on my back and control my breathing, but nothing helped me fall asleep. I was wide awake, and it seemed like it was staying that way.
After a while, I checked my phone and saw it was after one AM. Ugh. This sucked.
Trying to sleep was obviously a waste, so I got up. I ended up pacing my room for ten minutes, biting my nails as my thoughts ran wild. I wanted… well, I wanted something I definitely shouldn’t, from someone I shouldn’t want touching me at all.
Brett was a killer. I could never condone the things he’d done, but I also couldn’t judge him, because that’s why I’d asked for his help to begin with. I wanted him to kill someone for me.
No, Brett wasn’t the only fucked up one.
That had to be why I shuffled toward my door and quietly pulled it open, careful not to make a peep. I peeked out into the dark hallway, and once I was sure my parents were asleep, I slipped out of my room. My bare feet made not a sound on the hall carpet as I headed to the stairs.
What was I doing? Where was I going? To a bad man to make a terrible mistake.
I made it to the first floor of the house, turning along the wall of the stairs to the back door. My heart beat frantically in my chest, thudding away like it was trying to warn me:turn back now! Last chance to stop this nonsense!
I rushed to the door, my hand outstretched to unlock and open it, but I hesitated short. Six inches away from the knob, I wavered. Once we crossed this line, there was no going back, no pretending.
Maybe for him, but for me… I’d only ever wanted to be with one guy, and that guy had royally fucked me over in the end, whether he’d meant to or not. Zak had shattered me—but the truth was, I’d been cracked and ready to shatter for the longest time thanks to someone else.
What could Brett do to me that hadn’t already been done?
I shut my eyes, instinct guiding my hand to the lock. Once it was undone, I went for the knob and twisted it, and I pulled the door open. My eyelids lifted the moment I stepped outside, and when I saw the shrouded figure getting to his feet after sitting on the bottom step of the porch, my heart did a somersault.
There was a time when I would’ve immediately thought the figure belonged to my stalker, but all I needed was a quick look to know that wasn’t the case. The tall, imposing figure. The wide, strong shoulders. The lean, long legs that helped him tower over me and just about everyone else he met.
Brett. He was, once again, someplace he shouldn’t be.
I stood there, holding onto the door, for what felt like forever. Neither one of us said a word, a staring contest between us. Seconds passed, the cool night breeze reminding me I wore my fuzzy nighttime shorts and an extra baggy shirt. I probably looked like a kid wearing her dad’s shirt to him.
He wouldn’t. He couldn’t.
“Brett,” I whispered his name. “What are you doing here?”
He took a single step up from the grass. Six or seven feet between us, and even with the shadows of the night clinging to his face, I could see the intense look he was giving me. “It’s funny,” he said as he took another step up. “I was watching the house, like I always do at night to make sure your little creep doesn’t come in again, and I…”
Another step, and he was now on the porch with me. I watched him without blinking, though I did close the door behind me. Had to use it to lean on for support, because with the way Brett was approaching me right now, my legs grew a little weak.
