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I grab my bag, and walk the couple of blocks over to Main Street. It’s a bright, crisp day, and I happily breathe in the fresh air, still riding high from my Halloween hijinks. Mary-Alice is going to freak out when she hears—
My phone buzzes. It’s her. “You will not believe what I did last night,” I greet her without waiting. “Or rather,who.”
“Uh huh,” she sounds hurried and distracted. “Listen, there’s something you need to know--”
“No, me first,” I insist. “I never have anything exciting to tell you, but this... You would have been so proud of me, I went and seized life by the balls—well, not balls,” I add, smiling. “We didn’t get that far, but I definitely seized it by the lips.”
I sigh in happiness, remembering the epic heat of Reeve’s mouth on mine—
And then I catch sight of something across the street, and my blood runs cold.
“What the actual mother-effing hell?!” I squawk, stopping dead. Because standing in front of the best hotel in town, is an all-too familiar face.
Jake.
My ex-husband. All six foot two of his lying, cheating, tanned, buffed rat ass.
“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!” Mary-Alice finally exclaims. “Jake’s here, in Milford Falls!”
“No shit!” I hiss back, ducking out of sight behind the nearest mailbox. I peer out carefully, cursing the fact I look like a ball of yarn today. “What the hell is he doing here?”
He’s talking on his cellphone, looking perfectly relaxed. I don’t understand. Sure, Jake spent a ton of time in Milford Falls when we were married, but these days, his tastes run to big-city life, with flashy restaurants and clubs full of loud music and adoring fans.
"I’m trying to find out,” Mary-Alice says, sounding apologetic. “Eddie caught a glimpse of him on the way to the pharmacy to get more Clorox and Pedialytes.”
“I can’t believe it!” I groan. “I’m supposed to be free from his insincere smirks and total obliviousness. That’s what the divorce lawyers were for!”
“Maybe he’s come to apologize, beg forgiveness, and fairly split your marital assets?” Mary-Alice suggests.
We pause a beat, then both burst out into hollow laughter. “Good one,” I agree.
As I watch, a familiar-looking van pulls up, and more people pile out. Jake’s crew.Ourold crew, fromFortune Hunting. “It looks like he’s in town to shoot something,” I whisper, frowning. “But what? There’s nothing to find out here, except …”
No way.
No freaking way.
The answer comes to me immediately: Earl’s gold.
Jake and I always talked about filming it, a special episode about my family history and the hunt for the bank heist proceeds left behind, but we never had enough to go on. Like I said: people have been searching for that treasure forever, with nothing to show for it.
And Jake’s number one rule of reality TV? Never film anything unless he can come out with a win.
“I’ve got to run, Lexie’s stomach’s still iffy,” Mary-Alice says. “But I want updates. 24/7. About Jake’s latest bullshit, and your hot Halloween adventures with Reeve.”
“I will.”
As I hang up, Jake and the crew saunter down the street – in the direction of the museum, I realize, to my growing horror.
Shit. I’m in no state for a casual reunion right now, not before I know exactly what his game is, so I call Dot and beg off for the rest of the day. “I’m not feeling great,” I sort-of-lie, already walking fast in the other direction.
“Oh dear. That blue cheese has been hanging out in my pantry for a while…”
“I’ll be fine,” I blurt. “See you tomorrow!”
I steam home on foot, wondering what new fuckwittery Jake is about to unleash on my life. The last time I saw him, it was over a year ago, outside my divorce lawyer’s office, after finally agreeing on the (wildly insulting) split.
“No hard feelings, huh?” he flashed me his trademark smile, sauntering to his brand-new Tesla. “I know it doesn’t seem like much, but you’ll always be co-creator and executive producer ofFortune Hunting.”
