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Shaking my head, I turned away with a disgusted grunt. She no longer had any hold on me.
She was nothing to me.
To Amara, that was worse than me hating her.
I had seen how she reacted when Zoey came into Ryker’s life. Amara sensed the connection between them. The great warrior Viking had not only met his match in Zoey, but she was his mate. Amara hated that. She lost her power, her control over him.
“Croygen…” she called softly after me, a thread of anguish hinting, as if she felt the tie break for good. She would never curl her finger and have me running back to hereveragain.
Chapter 17
Katrina
The empty prison, not even layered with spells yet, had acid burning holes in my stomach, dread pitching like rogue waves.
This place was built to intimidate, petrify, and mentally brutalize you. So overwhelming, your own senses would feel like torture.
My mind couldn’t fathom that this idea came from Killian. The boy who snuck into the galley with me as children, playing pranks on the cook so we could nick extra sweets. Who sat next to me and watched the sea when I was feeling sad. The man who stood by me through the tough times when we were older, scraping every coin so we could buy a ship. Who proved his worth and kept me sane. That person was kind and had such a loving heart.
Not that I didn’t see the other side of Killian. Angry, resentful, short-tempered, and vengeful. He had been hurt so many times by people that he built up a high, thick wall, scarcely letting anyone in. But he let me in and then felt I turned on him because I didn’t love him the way he wanted me to.
Was all this a result of the pain he felt? Not just me, but his father, Hazem, Croygen, and countless others? Needing to prove something, needing to be above all those he felt betrayed him?
“Move, Kitty-Kat,” a deep voice rumbled in my ear, scattering tingles down my spine like a startled bird.
Croygen’s hand touched my lower back, his fingers imprinting on me, pushing me toward the stairs to the next level. His body was close to mine, moving in tandem.
The treachery Killian would feel if he saw me with Croygen, the anger and hurt, would be the ultimate betrayal. And I would understand. It was for me as well. Everything I said I stood for, had dedicated my life to… yet I wasn’t able to stay away from this man. I couldn’t deny or explain the ties I had always felt to the pirate. Where Killian had followed me wherever I went, I had followed Croygen.
Focusing back on our mission, we went down several levels before one led off into a hallway, the noise and action below creating a great cover for our movements.
“Maybe I should shift, scout out, and come back and get you guys,” I whispered to the group.
“So you can take it all for yourself?” Amara stepped up to me. “I don’t think so, cat thief. I know you’ll backstab us all to save your own crew and ship in a moment.”
“Me?” I pointed at myself in a quiet, mocking guffaw. “I’mthe one who will backstab?” Though there was truth to her words, which had my hackles raised. I had once devised taking it for myself to save my crew. Somewhere along the way, I had stopped thinking about it so I wouldn’t have to pick a side. Did I even know who I would choose anymore? Did I know? Deep down, I think I did, and that made me feel worse. “And how do you know about my crew?”
A squeak came from Croygen’s pocket.
“I didn’t mean to!” Sprig poked out. “Ursula, the sea witch, drugged me. I couldn’t stop myself.”
“Please. It took one packet of honey,” she scoffed.
“See?” He motioned to her. “I’m innocent! Honey is my Achilles’ heel, a truth serum.”
“Sprig.” Croygen’s jaw ticked. “Now is a wise time to stop talking.”
“Just saying. Evil Raggedy Ann doll here drugged me. I’m not to blame.”
“Your brain isn’t smart enough to be drugged.” Croygen shoved him back in his pocket.
“We’re staying together.” Amara made her stance clear, though I didn’t care what she wanted, my gaze going to Croygen’s.
“Let’s just stay together for now,” he muttered low. It irritated me that he chose her side. Did he still bow to whatever she wanted? Did he not trust me?
Did I really trust him?
Even with all these feelings, could I completely trust he wouldn’t cut me out if he had to?
