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Her eyes popped up, and she stared at me with that look of pity I had become uncomfortably familiar with, but I think it was enough to get her to leave me alone.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“No one does, so are we good here?” My head was pounding again.
“Yeah, okay. You know where to find me.”
“Yep, sure thing. Thanks.”
She spun slowly and walked away. I let out a huge sigh of relief. Before I closed the door, I caught Casen peeking out her door. She closed it quickly after our eyes met briefly. I shut my door, wondering if everyone was this nosy around here.
My phone rang again, and when I turned it over, I saw I had six missed calls from Baylor and Brandt. My heart sped up as I called back Brandt. A sick feeling rushed through me. Brandt answered on the second ring.
“Hey, man, what’s up? Is everything okay?” He had called to make sure everything was okay because Baylor was freaking out that I wasn’t answering her calls. “No, man, I’m fine. Just getting settled in, you know?” After appeasing him for a few minutes, we hung up. He said Baylor was doing well, but was struggling being away from me. It wasn’t fair to hear that. It wasn’t fair that she was struggling. She had my brother. And she was having a baby with him.
Iwas struggling.
I hopped in the shower, turning the heat up as hot as my skin would tolerate, and tried to scrub away the last five years of my life. I missed the hell out of Tessa, but I couldn’t move on if I let her ease into my thoughts all the time. And I needed to move on. It will be a year next month since the accident. A year was a respectable amount to grieve. It had to be.
My eyes dropped to the large gash across my side. The scar was still raised, but the pink had faded, settling into the permanence of white. It would be a constant reminder of that day. The day I held the only woman I could ever see myself loving in my arms and rocked her lifeless body until I went numb with pain and blind with rage. It consumed me still, and I knew if I didn’t leave my old life I would lose the only two people left who loved me. I could make enemies here and not give a shit. Let Tina think I’m a prick. Let Casen think I’m the world’s biggest jerk. I didn’t care, because I was here for me and only me.
