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“Yeah. But worse.”
“So like death?”
“More like I died, was brought back to life, and then died again.”
“Damn. But it makes sense. You were in another galaxy.”
She chuckles but still doesn’t look at me. Why is she being so shy? Is she embarrassed? I don’t care that she doesn’t feel good or isn’t wearing makeup or whatever she might be worried about. Or maybe she’s still angry.
I nudge her arm again. “You can take off your sunglasses. No need to be embarrassed.”
“It’s not that,” she says as she pulls them off. “The light hurts my head. But I am embarrassed about my behavior last night. And still a bit annoyed. I don’t need protection, Holden.”
Looking at her in her most natural state, she’s even more beautiful. Her freckles shine through and make her green eyes pop. Plus seeing her a little pissed off at me is sexy as hell. “You remember?” I’m surprised with how drunk she was.
“I remember up until a certain point. Walking away from you after yelling and doing a shit ton of shots.” She makes a face like she wants to puke. “Then the rest is blank.”
“I found you walking around the backyard talking to yourself. You were pissed at me, but eventually, I got you to go with me.”
“Ha, talking to myself. I’m sorry for yelling at you. I’m surprised you didn’t leave. But you don’t need to take care of me.”
“No need to apologize, but I wasn’t about to leave you there alone, Len.”
“I would’ve been fine.”
“You would’ve walked home that drunk?”
“Yeah, I’ve done it before. Or I would call an Uber.”
“It’s just dangerous. Something could happen.”
“Nothing will happen. I’ve done it a bunch of times.”
“Len, why do you sleep with different guys?” Another judgey question out of my mouth before I can swallow it back down. But dammit, she makes me worry.Why the fuck do I care so much?
I’m afraid she’ll take offense when I notice her back stiffening. But she only shrugs. “Sometimes I just need an escape, and it helps me forget things.”
Her answer tugs at my heartstrings. She’s hurting, and I see it all over her face. What is her pain from? Or who? Before I can say anything, she speaks first.
“Holden, I think we need to talk because I really don’t need you to—”
I stop her before she can say any more. I already know. Which leads into my idea and now’s the perfect time to ask her. “I know you don’t need me to protect you. But what if I make you an offer.”
She looks at me with confusion and squints her eyes. “What kind of offer? By the way, the light in here is killing me.” She puts her sunglasses back on.
“How about we make a sex pact?”
Her sunglasses come right back off. “What?”
“You know, a deal of sorts. If you feel the need to escape, you can call me and we can hook up. No questions asked.”
Once it’s out there in the open, I’m not sure how to feel, and by the look on her face, I don’t think she’s so sure either. Maybe it was a dumb idea. I just want to keep her safe, and I can’t think of any other way.
I keep talking to fill the silence. “It’ll just be sex, Len. Nothing more. Friends with benefits.”
“I don’t know…Those kinds of things never work out.”
“We’ll make it work. Neither one of us wants a relationship, so there’s nothing to worry about.”
