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Shortly after, a knock at the door brings a couple of young kids towing buckets of steaming water to fill the empty tub in the room, trip after trip until the bath is half full. By the time I stick my toe in the water, it’s already tepid.
Better than cold, but I prefer the molten lava of my apartment shower.
I scrub until my skin is pink. So odd to be alone finally. Before all this, I felt alone when Bobble was around, but not anymore. Not now that I know who he is. What he is.
And then things happened with Sunder the way I always feared they would. It was stupid to expect anything else. I just… I thought we’d finally gotten closer. It finally felt…
Real.
Like there was something more between us.
My mistake.
I won’t be making that one again. I’m surprised he didn’t ditch me in the forest the second the bond failed. I chuckle bitterly while I wash the rose-scented soap from my hair. I wash my clothes in the bath after I dry myself off, letting the air dry while I slip on a robe dress left by the bath attendants.
The worst part, by far, is that it was amazing.
The sex was so powerful and consuming. I felt like the world ceased to exist except for us. The way he made me feel? The way he played my body?
Incredible.
He rejected you. As you knew he would, the awful voice of self-doubt hisses again.
I sigh.
It’s easy to accept what Brenda has to say now because it’s so clearly the truth.
Somehow, I just feel dead to it.
Later in the evening I meander into the common room hoping to get some of the rabbit stew that is permeating my room with the scent of carrots, onions, and a delicious spice I can’t put my finger on.
I spot Sunder sitting at a table alone, nursing a cup of ale, looking like he might melt into the wood. His shoulders are hunched, head hanging low. He looks so sad. I almost feel bad for him.
Almost.
I straighten my new dress, smoothing the form-fitting fabric around my hips.
When I approach, he beams at me with widened eyes. He stands straight with head high and gestures for me to take a seat across from him.
“Where did you get that?” he asks, bemused.
I blush, “I’m tired of wearing dirty clothes, so I washed them. The innkeeper brought me this from the tailor next door to wear.”
He raises an eyebrow but smiles appreciatively, “You look beautiful, Mira. “
His cheeks are flushed and words a little slurred. Maybe he’s not nursing that cup after all.
“A compliment? From the stone-faced fae, who hates everyone?” I smirk.
His eyes light at my response, his smile growing. My heart skips a beat. What am I doing?
“I’m not a total stone heart,” he says in mock exasperation. His smile drops when he meets my eye again. “Mira… please. Let me just say something.”
“That you’re an asshole? I already knew that. Try something else.” My tone is clipped, unmoving. He cocks his head to the side with acknowledgement.
“You know this, but I’m still learning. I was wrong to blame you. Nothing that happened or didn’t happen was your fault. And even if we tried sooner, there’s no reason to think we’d find a solution. I’m so sorry.”
“So you’re saying you’re astupidasshole, then?”
