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I nodded. “I wish I’d known about you and Ian sooner.”
“I’m surprised he didn’t tell you.”
“As am I.”
She sank in the chair, arms still crossed over her chest. “When I was Necrosis, I knew I couldn’t have children, something I wanted more than anything. And then I was given a second chance, and Ian and I had a beautiful daughter. When we couldn’t have another, I was heartbroken, even though I reminded myself to be grateful rather than greedy. Our second baby came twenty years too late, but it was still a blessing, nonetheless. The loss was unbearable…” Her eyes shone in the light of the candles, a distinct gloss. She quickly blinked it away. “I knew Ian didn’t want it, and I fear he prayed to the gods for a different outcome.”
“He didn’t.”
“We’ll never know—”
“My brother would never do that, Avice. I know he’s broken your trust, but he’s not a liar, and he’s proven that he’s not a liar. He’s a man of honesty and integrity. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have told you what he’d done.”
She watched me, her eyes guarded once again.
“Ian fucked up. No argument there. But you know how much he loves you. You know this isn’t something he would do in any other circumstance. Ian could have cheated all throughout your marriage without getting caught, but he never has. Please give him another chance.”
“Can I ask you something, Huntley?”
I felt my muscles stiffen.
“If you went through a depression so deep that you couldn’t get out of bed, and Ivory slept with someone else, would you forgive her?”
I couldn’t picture that, not because it was impossible, but because it would kill me. I would hunt down the motherfucker who touched my wife and slice his head clean from his shoulders.
“That’s what I thought.”
“That’s not the full picture, Avice. Ian said this went on for months, and you completely shut him out. That’s a long time to be ignored by your wife. You’re entitled to your grief, but abandoning your husband is unacceptable. He may have violated your marriage with his actions, but you also violated it by neglect. You assumed he prayed for this to happen, which is a horrible accusation. And I say this as respectfully as possible, bringing a child into the world at our age would be irresponsible. You romanticized it like it would be a much different experience than it really would be, not to mention the problems the child would most likely have. Your emotion has clouded your sound logic, and you let it destroy your marriage.”
Her eyebrows slowly rose up her face as she tensed, and a fire sparked in her eyes the way it did with Ivory when something pissed her off. Avice kept her thoughts to herself, but her anger was visible. “Maybe all of that is true, Huntley. But the grief took over my mind, body, and heart. I had no control over it. And if you don’t understand that, it’s because you’re lucky enough never to have experienced it yourself. Ian made a choice to fuck someone. I wasforcedto endure that depression.”
It grew more challenging to carry on the conversation, because all I wanted was for the two of them to be together again. But it was complicated and messy, and talking about relationships and shit wasn’t my forte. “With all due respect, Ivory and I went through the same thing, and while it was hard, she didn’t shut me out. If anything, it brought us closer together.”
“Because you both lost something,” she snapped. “Ian didn’t want it.”
“You know if this had been ten or twenty years ago, his reaction would have been completely different. He never wanted Lila to be an only child, and he confided his disappointment to me on numerous occasions. I hate to say it, but you’re being unreasonable about this.”
“Unreasonable…”
I knew I’d taken it too far. “I just think you wouldn’t have been so upset if you were more logical about the situation rather than emotional. Ian may not be your blood, but he’s your family. You lost that in this crisis, but you need to get it back. Rebuild your marriage.”
“He fucked someone else.”
“I understand that’s hard—”
“So the next time we hit a rough patch, he’s going to screw someone?”
“He wouldn’t, Avice.”
“You never answered my question, Huntley.”
A deep breath filled my lungs.
“If your mother passed away, and you were inconsolable for months—even though that would be unreasonable because she lived a long and full life—and then Ivory slept with someone else because you didn’t give her the attention she wanted, would you be okay with that?”
It was difficult to picture, because if I lost my mother, I would only hold Ivory tighter rather than push her away. And no matter how bad things got between us, Ivory would never betray my trust.
“The answer is written all over your face.”
