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The shower turns off, and I slam the notebook shut.
Here goes nothing.
“What are you doing in my room?” Lily’s voice is flat. She has a towel wrapped around her torso and emotionless eyes.
I force a smile. “I’m glad you’re still here.”
“Not for long. Now get out.”
“I need to apologize.” I grab the mug of tea from her desk, presenting it to her, but Lily stands motionless.
You need to explain to Lily why you’re sorry and how you’ll prevent it from happening again.
“I’m sorry, Lily. I should’ve texted you earlier. The last thing I want to do is miss out on time with you.” She doesn’t mirror my blaring grin. I have to be fucking this apology up. “And you’re right. I’ve never cared for someone else or needed to keep anyone updated on my whereabouts. I don’t know how to, and it’s not fair on you.”
Lily unwraps the second towel perched on her head and scrunches her damp strands. “No, it isn’t fair.”
Nerves strum in my chest at her sternness.She’s going to leave, isn’t she?
“Look, Lil, I’m not asking you to watch over me at all. But, I promise, I’m gonna try to turn it around. Please give me a chance to stop being such a selfish prick.”
“I’ve dealt with selfish pricks my whole life, Nico.” Her brows crease with disappointment. “As myfriend, I expected you to treat me differently.”
“I’m not trying to make excuses, but I fuck up like this with my friends all the time.” What I can’t say is that it feels like the lines of friendship between us are blurred. If I can’t remedy this, I don’t know what I’ll do. “No one has stuck around long enough to make me fess up to my flaws.”
Except for my family, or Keith, but it’s different. It never mattered.
Lily frowns. “It’s not my job to try and change you.”
“I know, and it’s not what I’m asking. I just appreciate you calling me out on it. I want to do better for you.”
“Why?” She eyes me suspiciously.
“Why what?”
“We’refriends,” she reminds me.“Our little arrangement doesn’t change that. Why do you want me to be the one to call you out on your fuckups? Hell, why do you even want me here? I’m not at all cut out for your lifestyle.”
This isn’t going according to plan. I’m losing her. “You don’t need to do or be anything you aren’t. Lil, I promised you a vacation, an opportunity to relax. So that’s what I’ll give you. Besides, I like having you here. It makes me happy.” My heart beats loud and steady as I clear my throat. “And I—I want to care about someone other than myself for once.” The words slip out, and I mean them.
It sucks being the kind of man people can’t rely on. I’m also tired of my brother always treating me like we’re still kids and he’s waiting for me to fuck up.
Change is imminent.
“Is that even possible?”
“Come on,princesa.” I resist dropping to my knees and begging. “Let me spoil you and give you a summer you’ll never forget.”
“Being attacked with a selfie stick and breaking my phone. Unforgettable.” She frowns, but I can see the smallest gleam in her eyes, the same one she has when suppressing a laugh.
“You can’t go home with that as your highlight.Pleasegive me some more time. The month isn’t even over yet.”
Lily considers me, the gears in her head operating on all cylinders.
We watch each other from across the room. Worry wraps around my throat in a suffocating embrace.
“I’m really, truly sorry, Lil. I was an asshole.”
“You were.” She stretches her neck from side to side. “I’m sorry I blew up at you, but you have to I understand I was terrified.”
