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“No,” I sigh, yanking a silk blouse out of my suitcase and tossing it at Lily.
“She’s getting married,” Avery clarifies. She grabs the top and neatly folds it onto the pile of clothes on my bed.
“Only if my parents approve,” I remind my best friends. “He’s just my boyfriend for now.”
The thought of Matthew Hudson being my boyfriend has been one I can’t stop mulling over.
My brain—or body—can’t comprehend the fact that this is all a ruse. The past couple of days, the anxiety of us spending two weeks together in such close quarters has caused me to lose sleep.
It must be a side effect of my melatonin and stress cocktail.
That’s it. It has to be. Or my little white pill needs a dose adjustment.
My friends and I have spent the last hour going through my closet.Lily, my old roommate, lives across the street. Avery is a quick park walk away. They insisted on helping me pack even when I assured them it was unnecessary. But they wouldn’t take no for an answer and showed up with an extra cheesy pizza.
My favorite kind.They know me so well.
“I still don’t understand how we missed all of the drama at your wedding shower,” Lily says. “Or how you managed to stand with Lance at the end to thank everyone for coming.”
“It was fine. I didn’t want to draw any more attention.” I barely remember the rest of that day, thankfully.
Lily strolls over to my dresser and pulls out pieces of lingerie I have no business taking with me to Arizona. “I wish you’d told us your parents set you up with that bread slice of a man. How’s he handling the split? Did he just shrug his shoulders and swap spit with someone new?”
“He’s…” I try to find a word to explain Lance’s reaction to the news that I was ending our engagement. But nothing suitable comes to mind. Nothing to help define exactly what led him to send me thirty texts over the past week. “Hurt. I think his ego is bruised. But he never really liked me.” My thumb instinctively rubs the inside of my now empty ring finger.
His messages replay in my head.
Lance
We need to talk
Stop ignoring me Molly!!! Since when do you not answer?
We’re getting married in less than three months
Your driving me up the wall
If I had Lily’s confidence, I would have responded to the last one with: It’s you’re*.
I won’t give in to his empty threats. I’m tired of worrying about what Lance wants. Honestly, he’s probably used our shattered engagement to gain sympathy from other women. Though I don’t understand how anyone can be attracted to someone who prioritizes hair pomade and status over forming a real connection.
“I hate him even more. How could anyone not like you?” Lily rolls her eyes.
“You’re sweet.” I smile.
He’s not the only one confused by my behavior. My mom can’t wrap her head around the fact that I’m standing my ground. She keeps calling and asking me if I’ve come to my senses or if I’ve scheduled the last fitting for my wedding dress, a starch white custom Vera Wang that’s hard to look at. If they approve my wedding with Matthew, I’ll pick my own dress.
Just have to make it through the next two weeks. That’s all.
“Seriously, Molly, all you had to tell me was,I gotta marry this douchehat for money.” Lily walks back to the bed, a pile of colorful fabrics falling from her arms and onto the sheets. She brushes back the long braid of black hair from her shoulder and raises one of her plucked brows at me. “I would’ve said,Thank fuck, that makes so much sense, and then helped you get out of it.” She laughs so easily.
Lily Rodin has no issues speaking her mind, and I wish I could crack the code to her confidence.
“I guess I was embarrassed,” I admit. I wrap one of my fingers in a loose curl on my chest, twirling the strand until it turns frizzy. Or maybe I was guilty, a little ashamed. I was ready to give up a piece of myself to keep my parents happy, to continue a legacy that’s been around for generations.
The pressure of my world requires me to be pliant, and I finally said no.
Does this make me selfish? Would that even be a bad thing?
