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“Why do you want this?” I asked, pressing my forehead to hers. I had to know for sure. If she thought she was the only vulnerable one here, she was sadly mistaken. She might discover she really liked having a boyfriend, just not necessarily me. It had happened before.
Chapter 35 – Sadie
Why did I want this?
What a question. I wanted Denver’s lips on mine more than I wanted air at the moment. I’d been momentarily flustered. So much so, that I’d ran from the room like the incredible chicken I was. But I came back.
Didn’t that count for something?
I reached out and fingered the material of Denver’s T-shirt. He seemed so calm, but his breaths were coming in quick bursts, and I realized he was not teasing me. He wanted this, but he was exerting a lot of self-control in order to let me decide up to the last second if I wanted it.
And I did want this. To move forward and not back. All I had to do was convince him. With words. Sometimes words were the worst. It was doubly hard to gather my thoughts with his forehead pressed against mine and his hands in my hair. Wow, he was a gorgeous man, inside and out.
“Because I trust you. And I lo—like you.” Oh my gosh, I’d almost dropped the love word on him. Moving on. I’d agonize over that later. “I think kissing would be a really excellent way to show you that. There doesn’t have to be a right moment for it. Just the right people. I think we’re the right people.”
“Ok.” He barely got the word out before his lips were on mine, and oh, were they. He was done holding back, and so was I. I gripped his shirt, pulling him closer. But it was awkward with our knees hitting, and without breaking lip to lip contact I joined him on the couch, kneeling next to him and wrapping my arms around his neck. Why had I thought this would be awkward? Denver knew exactly what he was doing, and I was catching up fast.
It was still a contest of wills, except now we were headed towards the same goal—diving into the chemistry that had always been there, from that first moment last year when he came out on his porch shirtless, and I’d barreled past him into his house and locked the door on him. Thwarting his easy charm had been oh, so satisfying. Almost as satisfying as leaning back a bit now and seeing the awe in his eyes.
I felt cherished, and wanted, and so utterly seen.
Denver smiled, tucking a strand of hair back into place and running his fingers along my ear. His gaze went there, and then his lips, kissing a trail along my jawline in this perfect torture I’d be happy to submit to forever.
“I should stop now,” he whispered, kissing my neck one last time.
“Okay.” I sank down next to him on the couch and rested my head on his chest. I could have fallen asleep like that, listening to his breathing go from all-hands-on-deck back to calm, except his phone started ringing. It was next to us on the couch, almost falling into the cushion.
He ignored it, but I leaned over him and looked. “It’s your mom.”
“She knows I love her. I’ll call her later. Let me just bask.”
“Bask?” I poked his middle. “Bask in what?”
“In you. You’re my sunshine.”
“No one has ever referred to me as sunshine before.”
“Well, that’s a shame.” He kissed my forehead, the tip of my nose, and then my lips because of course I tipped my face up so he could reach. He tasted like the watermelon we’d eaten. Maybe I should reconfirm that.
His phone started ringing again.
Denver groaned and rested his head back. “This is what they do.”
“Who, your parents?”
“Yes. They know I’ll ignore the first call.”
“Is it ever important?”
“No. They’ll tell me I left a phone charger at their house, or they discovered a show on Netflix they know I’ll love. They don’t believe in texting.”
“It’s because you’re an only child. My brother has supplied my dad with grandchildren, so I can get away with ignoring calls.”
“You should answer more. We both should.” He sighed and picked up his phone, turning it over in his hands. “They’ll ask who I’m dating. Are you prepared for that?”
“To be the next in a string of many?” I laughed when he growled at me. “I have to be able to tease you a little.”
I was only half-joking. Acknowledging it helped me deal with the risk I was taking. Relationships were always a risk—one I had previously been unwilling to accept. But that couldn’t be me anymore. I had to grow and change, and there was no one I felt more comfortable doing that with than Denver. I felt strong enough now to accept the possibility of heartbreak. Maybe even the inevitability of it.
