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A flurry of mixed emotions hit me. I was going to be the one to take Essa, unless there was some way I could try to convince her to back out. I’d try one last time to talk her out of it. The thought of being with her was a dream come true, but also made me want to rage, thinking about taking her for the first time in front of Bruno’s cameras. My mind reeled from all the problems this could cause us.
The smell of the whiskey wafted to my nose as it sat in its glass, tempting me. I hated that I knew its scent so well. Sweat formed on the back of my neck just thinking about downing it before leaving. My mouth watered. I turned and walked out of the office.
Somehow, I made it to the car and drove away, peeling out of the parking lot. The guard waved goodbye to “Griff the Giant” as I gunned the engine. I’d have to come up with a better porn name.
The Armstead Brewery was a small brick standalone that looked like a place you may get a blowjob in the bathroom from someone with no teeth. It didn’t surprise me that Johnny Davis would own it. Walking into the dimly lit wood-paneled interior, I checked out the large area on the left that contained two pool tables and a few dartboards. An odor of onion rings and beer permeated the atmosphere.
Straight ahead, the rest of the establishment held tall wooden booth seats along one wall and some two-seater tables in front of a long beat-up bar. At this time of day, there were only a few patrons sitting near the bartender, watching the TV on the barback. Behind the bar stood a familiar man.
Howard Dixson had aged. Gone was the spunky guy with bleach-blond Billy Idol spikes, replaced by a cut man with long golden locks that reached a pair of buff shoulders. His trimmed beard made him almost unrecognizable to me. This was a kid who was always envious of Davis and me growing ’staches in high school every November.
When he looked to the door, his eyes turned up along with the corners of his mouth. His legs hurried toward me as I strode over to the side of the bar to greet him. We embraced as brothers, then held each other back at an arm’s length.
“Man, I can’t believe it. You’ve finally grown some facial hair. Next thing you know, you’ll get pubes,” I joked.
“Fuck you, Griff. I thought I had the beard last visit.”
“Nah. Not yet. Think you had your hair back, too.” He slapped me on the back and took his place up behind the bar. I slid onto an empty stool at the end.
“Davis should be here shortly. Can I get you something?”
“Just water. How are you? How long has this place been open?”
Dix sprayed water into a cup and passed it to me. “Mmm, almost two years, I think. Been here the whole time. Davis wouldn’t do it without me.”
“I’m sure.” My mouth tightened. “How is Davis? Haven’t heard a lick from him. He seeing anybody?” Maybe I shouldn’t even bring it up. I was treading into dangerous territory.
“I mean, he gets laid. But no.” Leaning over the bar so he could speak at a softer level, he said, “If you mean, has he gotten over Kara? Never, Griff.”
Twirling the cup in my hands, I stared at the wooden counter. Kara, our fourth member and childhood friend. Things would be weird without her, but there was no way I wanted to mention her name. If I was starting over in life, then she would have to be a distant memory. “I don’t know what happened. He never answered my letters.”
“She left him a note, man. She wrote a note before… I don’t know what it said, but Davis has been messed up ever since. And I think it had to do with that night.” Kara was there, I vaguely recall. She was there most nights with us because we traveled as a team… But the memory is fuzzy.
“Whoa! I heard you was back!” Johnny Davis strolled in, skin filled with more tattoos than I’d seen on him before I left. His light brown hair was styled into a half pompadour of perfection and his blue eyes blazed at me. “You’re fucking huge, man!”
Coming around to my stool, Davis grabbed me in as warm an embrace as Dix had. Maybe he had missed me. The reluctance I’d felt at seeing him again eased slightly with the hug.
“Welcome to my place! Can I get you a drink? Celebrate your return? We should throw a party!”
I wasn’t interested in the kinds of parties Davis used to throw, and part of me wondered if this was a setup. “I’m all right. It’s good to see you. You look the same, other than all that ink.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, but not as much as you.”
Nodding toward the table area, I said, “’Grats, man. Bar owner. You’ve come up in the world.”
“Yeah. Took that money we got fucking around before and invested in this place.”
“Fucking around.”That’s what he was calling it? “Bruno help you out?”
“Nah, nah. Just me by myself. What are you drinking, water? Well, I guess after that night, that would turn anyone sober.”
Dropping my head, I focused on the ice in my cup. Violent shame filled me. Was Davis going to tell me what happened? Did I evenwantto know?
My mouth was dry as I asked, “What happened that night?”
Davis answered, “Man, you were beyond wasted.” I’d heard this from him before. “Couldn’t stand up.”
“But inside the house… Davis, what happened?”
