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So far, I’d managed to avoid everyone. I was sober and sneaking through shadows. I’d ditched my cell phone in case it was being traced. Wandering around like a homeless man, I found an old hoodie to keep warm during the night.
Over the last day, I huddled in a bush, then found my way to use a park’s facilities and bought some fast food for sustenance, never lowering the hood of my sweatshirt. The hallucinogen induced insight seemed to wake up the part of my brain that controlled my self-destructive urges. I hadn’t craved alcohol and knew I wasn’t going to hit the bottle again. Essa deserved better, and I wanted to be that for her.
Even if I had to turn myself in, Ihadto see her before I would be put away for years. Before the cops arrested me, I was going to make it to her. Wandering through neighborhoods and back alleys, I found my way to her old blue house. The curtains in the front window were open, and the lights were on inside when I sneaked out from behind her neighbor’s house across the street.
Fury filled my chest when I saw Davis’s Corvette in the drive. She could be in a lot of trouble if he was inside. I went around the side of the house and noticed a window out, covered with thick plastic. Her trash cans were still underneath them, easy for someone to sneak inside. What was she thinking?
At the back of the house, lights danced on the grass, shining from the television screen, casting shadows on two figures on the sofa. I lifted onto my toes near the window and peeped inside. Essa was on the sofa, struggling to push Davis off her naked body and screaming. Motherfucker was trying to rape her. I could hear her yelling no through the thin glass.
Sprinting back to the kitchen window, I leaped onto the trash can, figuring it would be the quickest way inside. Bursting through the plastic, I roared like a wild animal, tearing my way into the den, making my presence known.
Davis reared up from burrowing his face into Essa’s neck while she was trying with everything she had to push him off. I grabbed him by the back of his shirt and tore him off her body. Not even hesitating, I jumped on his chest and punched him repeatedly in the face. I wasn’t going to stop; I was going to murder a second man right here in the same room.
“Stop! Eli! Stop! Don’t kill him!” Essa’s screams seemed so far away from the mission I had my focus on, even as her little hands attempted to pull my arm back. My thighs clenched Davis’s torso, holding him in place while I punched his face. Davis was laughing in between passing out. Essa sobbed. “Eli! You have to stay with me!”
That was the only thought that made me pause. She was right. If I killed him, I would go to prison for murder. I would be put away for life, and I would never see my baby girl again.
Dropping Davis’s shirt, I stood over him. He was barely conscious. As he came to, he rolled on his side, groaning. I ripped off my hoodie and threw it over Essa’s naked body. She didn’t protest and allowed me to cover her. Gathering her in my arms, I squeezed her tightly to my chest.
“Did he… Did he hurt you?” My breath came out in gruff pants.
Sniffling, she wiped her nose with the back of her hand and told me, “N-no. I mean, he didn’t. No. Almost, but no. He hit me.” Brushing back some of her long blonde strands that were sticking to her wet cheeks, I glared down at the miscreant barely breathing on her floor.
“Get up, you piece of shit. Get the fuck out of here. I never want to see your face again, or else I will kill you.” When he didn’t move, I lifted Davis up by his shirt, forcing him to his feet.
The welts around his eyes were already forming as he looked at me through puffy eyelids. “You done fucked up now, Griff. You didn’t want me to fuck your girl? You shouldn’t have fucked mine.” Fuck. So he did know… Waiting for the guilt to hit me, it never came. I didn’t feel a bit sorry for what I had done for the first time in my life. Was this disgusting act his revenge?
“Dix told you—”
Davis laughed while wheezing. “Dixson didn’t tell me shit, idiot. Kara. She told me about you two fucking behind my back. For afucking year, Eli. You fuckedmygirl behind my back for a year. YouknewI was going to marry her. She told me she felt so guilty about you two that she couldn’t stand that you were in prison. Shemissedyou. Shelovedyou.Youwere the reason she killed herself, you bastard. I fucking hate you. You took her away from me. Now, I’m going to take away your love from you.”
“Unlikely,” I said flatly, as Essa turned into my body to hold on to me tighter. There was no way I’d let this man near her again. I would go back to prison if it meant saving her. His feelings toward me were now mutual.
Davis stumbled from the room, and I made sure he took off as we watched from the front window. Essa buried her face in my chest. She mumbled something I couldn’t hear.
“What?”
She gazed up at me, her blue eyes big and wide, willing to hear me for the first time. “Thank you, Eli. What were you doing here? Why did you show up tonight?”
Caressing her face in both my big palms, I held her so I could tell her everything. “I had to apologize, sunshine. I had to make things right between us. I need to watch over you, protect you.” Gripping her closer to my chest, I held her tightly, never going to let her go. “I can’t remember what happened that night, the night Pete was killed, but I swear—”
“Eli, I don’t think you did it.”
My eyebrows grew closer together. “Wh-why do you say that?”
“I don’t think you were capable. My father wasstabbedtwelve times. He wasn’t shot. You didn’t shoot him. If you were as intoxicated as Davis said you were, how could you have done that?”
“He wasstabbed?I-I didn’t know this… You-you don’t think I did it?”
Pulling back from me, tears filled her eyes. “No. You couldn’t have.” Stunned, I held her arms and blinked several times, letting the words enter me. Maybe I was innocent after all. If so, that could be it. I would be free, free to be the man she needed.
She then held me so close that I lifted her into a carry. Her legs wrapped around my waist as her little arms clung to my neck. She whispered, “You didn’t do it. You didn’t. I know it. I feel it.” Burrowing my head into her hair, I squeezed my eyes shut. This was better than any dream; it was like coming back to life.
My voice was muffled by her skin as I told her, “You’re mine. No one else’s. I’m here. Daddy is here.”
Squeezing her waist with one arm and her butt with the other, I carried her to her bedroom, laying her gently on the mattress. She was looking at me with such longing, I leaned over her and said, “I love you, Essa. I love you. I’ve missed you.”
She reached up to kiss me, and I deepened our connection, but I still didn’t touch her body with mine. She probably needed some space. And possibly more time. I wanted to make sure she felt completely safe. I knew it may take time to trust me again. For me to make things perfect and right for her. For us.
