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I mean… at least he wasn’t going to ask me for a pity fuck. I’d sleep with him in a heartbeat, but only if hewantedme. Not in the name of being-be-gone. No matter how much those beings were clearly stressing him out.
Desperate for some levity to distract from the sudden focus on Matt and me getting into bed, I chanced a smirk. “So you asked a fae—one you’ve had to represent over her shady practices—about matchmaking?” I snorted. “Did you fae around and find out?”
Matt rolled his eyes. “Really?”
“What?” I chuckled. “I’m just saying. You of all people know better than to ask a fae for something. Especially one who’s neededyourhelp.”
To my great relief, he managed a halfhearted laugh, too. “Please. What magic wielder hasn’t needed a lawyer at some point?”
“Eh, okay, fair.” I cleared my throat, trying to collect my dignity and not make this any worse for him. At least we weren’t talking about us fucking anymore. “Do they, uh…” I gestured at his winged friends. “Do they have names?”
“Um. I didn’t… I didn’t ask.”
“No, you didn’t,” the demon said indignantly. “It’s just been ‘what the fuck are you?’ and ‘what the fuck is going on?’” He huffed. “Can’t even be bothered to ask what our fucking names are.”
“Really?” The angel leaned past Matt’s head. “Mustyou curse so much?”
“Of course I must! I’m a fucking demon!”
The angel seemed to consider that, then said, “He does make a compelling argument.”
“He does.” Matt exhaled, peering at the demon but then apparently thinking better of it. Probably because he was, I assumed, hungover. Looking that closely at anything must’ve hurt. Sounding defeated and miserable, he asked, “What are your names, anyway?”
The angel straightened, smiling broadly and puffing out his chest as if he were about to deliver some kind of grand speech.
But the demon spoke first: “I’m Andras. The feathered wankstain is called Raziel.”
The angel—Raziel, apparently—deflated and crossed his arms.
“Andras and Raziel.” Matt rubbed his face again. “Glad we’ve all been…” He paused, then gestured at me. “He’s Cory, by the way.”
“Pleasure to make your acquaintance,” Raziel said.
Andras just gave a sarcastic wave.
I… had no idea how to respond. Maybe because I hadn’t had enough coffee to process that I was being introduced to a tiny angel and a tiny demon at the same time I was trying to help my friend sort out a crisis.
I shifted on the couch. “So she told you about her matchmaking magic.”
Nodding, Matt grimaced. “The rest of the conversation is…” He chewed his lip. “I was drunk, so…”
So he didn’t remember. Got it.
I sat straighter. “Wait, doesn’t that mean the contract is null and void? If you can’t remember agreeing to it? Or even what the terms are?”
Matt pursed his lips. Then he shook his head. “Unless she’ll voluntarily rescind it, I’m pretty well fucked.”
“Why?”
“Because in order to push the issue, I’d have to file something formal. There’d have to be a hearing. In a courtroom.”
“Ooh.” I sagged back against the cushion. “Yeah. That… complicates things, doesn’t it?”
“Just a bit.” Matt made an unhappy sound. “Fuck. I have court next week! I can’t walk into the courtroom like…” He gestured wildly at Andras and Raziel. “Likethis!”
“No, no, you can’t.” I patted the air. “Let’s… Why don’t we go see her? Maybe she’d be willing to negotiate something else.”
“We?”
