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Rose brushes the hair away from my face. “Honey, can I ask you something?”
I lift my head off her shoulder to look at her. “Of course.” I sniffle.
“Do you think some of these tears might be for another reason?”
Curiosity shifts the features of my face as I tilt my head.
“Not to sound like a broken record, but you haven’t shedonetear since your grandmother passed away.”
I’m initially defensive, but I bite my tongue when I realize her words hold truth. “Who are you? My therapist?”
“Yes. I’m also your financial advisor, your wellness coach, your legal counsel, and your religious officiant.” She grins while rubbing my back. “And I’m still your neighbor.”
“You’re more than my neighbor, Rose.” The smile I give the woman I’ve known my whole life is filled with affection.
“Your grandmother was my best friend, so you’re family.” Rose turns away and stares out the window. “She wasmyfamily for over forty years.”
“I know you loved her too.”
“There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss her or think about her, wanting to hear her laugh or fuss with me about some silly TV show.” She faces me again, her eyes soft with emotion. “It’s okay to miss her, Teddie You’re allowed to, you know.”
My eyes well with tears. “I know I am. I just wasn’t prepared for it to hit me today while sitting in this empty room. Another person has suddenly left my life—someone I care about—and I have no control over the situation. There were no parting words, no hugs goodbye, nothing to comfort me in their absence.” I blink back the heartache threatening to spill over. “And it just… it triggered all the pent-up sadness I’ve been holding back since Grammy’s funeral. Lying to myself because I didn’t want to feel pain. Yet, here I am, heartbroken because some stupid boy didn’t like me back.” I roll my eyes at myself, annoyed by my feelings.
Rose lifts my chin with a chastising expression. “You know he did. At least, this time, you can do something about it.”
“There’s nothing to be done, Rose. His life isn’t here. You said it yourself: he’svacation people.”
“Oh, I know what I said.” Shetsksher tongue at me while waving a dismissive hand. “But I’m just an old woman. Why are you listening to me anyway?”
“Because you’re awiseold woman. And my advisor of all things.”
The corners of her eyes crinkle with amusement. “Maybe Mr. Psycho Writer Man will come to his senses and realize the mistake he’s made. And believe me, he made abigmistake.”
“He’s not a psycho. He just writes them,” I correct while she ignores me. Bringing fresh air into my lungs, I loudly exhale and wipe beneath my eyes. “Maybe he will realize it, but maybe not… I just know that I’ve kissed a lot of frogs in my life and no one made me feel the way Nate did. It may have been only the two of us here, but it felt… right. It was never formal or awkward or uncomfortable. We’re opposites, sure. But somehow, we fit together perfectly.”
“Then tell him that,” she urges with a nudge to my shoulder.
“I’ll think about it.”
Who am I kidding? I won’t think about it. Because the truth is I need to let him go. We had our time together, short as it was. And I enjoyed every minute of it, especially the minutes spent naked. But I shouldn’t have to convince him to stay.
I deserve better than that.
11
Nate
Ilay in bed for over an hour, dreading getting up. But today, I depart from this terrible, yet wonderful vacation that I know I’ll remember for the rest of my life. Dragging my feet, I head to the kitchen, and I’m surprised Teddie isn’t here, making a fresh pot of coffee.
I wouldn’t call it a fight,per se, but we certainly weren’t on pleasant terms when she walked out of my room yesterday. I didn’t intend to be harsh—I would never purposefully hurt her—but the words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them. And you can’t put the genie back in the bottle. Still, I thought she would put it all aside for my last day in her home. But hours pass, and she still doesn’t emerge from her room.
Shedoesremember I’m going home today, right?
With a resigned sigh, I finish packing my bags and set them by the front door. Then, I anxiously pace the living room while waiting for my Uber, wondering what my next move should be. I just need to see her face one last time, and maybe the knot in my throat will loosen so I can breathe. Perhaps that’s selfish of me, since I was the asshole here, and I don’t deserve another minute of her sunshine.
But I’m a dick, and I can’t help myself. I want Teddie, even if it’s only for a few moments.
So I try to make noise without being too obvious, shutting cabinets in the kitchen and running water in the powder room sink as if I’m washing my hands. I loudly clear my throat outside her door, wishing she’d pop her head out and tell me to quiet down. But, no matter what I do, there’s not a stir from her room and the house remains quiet. I’m holding out hope that she’ll come out any second now, but then I receive a text that my ride is here, and I know I can’t wait any longer.
